Trilogy Of Error

Homer · Bart · Lisa:D'oh! [Screams] - Whee! - Whoo-hoo! - Yeah! - [Groans] D'oh!

Ned:Son of a diddly!

Homer:You know I like my breakfast fried or chicken-fried.

Marge · Homer · Bart · Lisa:It's a healthy cereal from Europe. Müeslix! [All Shuddering]

Marge:They also make Juice-lix.

Bart:That's Milhouse. And it sounds like he has big news!

Lisa:Meet Linguo, the grammar robot. I built him all by myself.

Homer · Linguo · Homer:Me love beer. / I love beer. / Oh, he loves beer. Here, little fella.

Homer:I'm sorry. I thought he was a party robot.

Lisa:Oh! This is why I can't have nice things.

Homer:Homer wants a brownie. I'm gonna get one. / Coming in from the left. / Or is it the right? Look out for the reach-around!

Homer:He shoots, he sc- [Screams] My thumb!

Homer:Sorry doesn't put thumbs on the hand, Marge!

Homer:Reattach a thumb? This isn't Gattaca!

Chief Wiggum:9-1-1. This better be good.

Chief Wiggum:Attempted murder? You'll burn for this- burn in jail!

Chief Wiggum:123 Fake Street. Got it.

Ned:And Harry Potter and all his wizard friends went straight to hell for practicing witchcraft.

Homer:If the doctor asks why you cut it off, you caught me in bed with four beautiful women.

Chief Wiggum:My Ferrari! I had to do awful things to pay for her.

Homer · Dr. Hibbert:But I have finger insurance! / A thumb is not a finger.

Dr. Hibbert:Well, I could cut off the other thumb for a sense of symmetry.

Marge:Hibbert's really losing it. We're going to Dr. Nick's.

Moe:Just stick the old eye gouger in the pickle brine. That'll keep your thumb fresh and delicious.

Homer:Well, I really shouldn't, what with my massive blood loss and all. Although I do like the occasional beer.

Homer:Did you ever see that Blue Man Group? Total rip-off of the Smurfs. And the Smurfs- They suck!

Country driver:You and me share a common infirmity. If anyone ever tells you a hog won't eat a finger, they's lyin'.

Country driver:Inflammable means flammable? What a country!

Country driver:Somebody done 'stolded' my wheels!

Homer:Say good-bye to your brother.

Linguo:Linguo... is... dead. [Powering Off]

Lisa · Homer · Linguo · Linguo:Lie still. / I knew that. Just testing. / Sentence fragment. / 'Sentence fragment' is also a sentence fragment.

Linguo:Must conserve battery power. [Powers Off]

Krusty:Idiot! You almost ran over a viewer! And she's in our key demo!

Lisa · French Teacher:Huh? This isn't Miss Hoover's class. / I do not know this Mademoiselle Hoover of which you speak.

Lisa · French Teacher:What's happening? Where am I? / Sacre bleu! What a foolish question! You are at West Springfield Elementary School. / West Springfield? I'm at the wrong school!

Lisa · Thelonious:I guess they didn't have enough money to hire I.M. Pei. / Oh. You know about I.M. Pei?

Thelonious · Lisa · Thelonious:My name's Thelonious. / As in Monk? / Yes. The esoteric appeal is worth the beatings.

Chief Wiggum:No can do, doll face. I got an informant wearing a wire. Just like on Nash Bridges.

Fat Tony:Why, I'd be delighted to sell you some illegally smuggled goods.

Chief Wiggum:My bad. I can't work my answering machine either.

Country driver:Abracathumbra!

Country driver:Dang! You could be one of them TV magic queers.

Milhouse:This is where I come to cry.

Milhouse:Bottle rockets, frog launchers, Weeping Mamas. Tijuana Toilet Crackers!

Sea Captain:Don't worry. It's inflammable.

Chief Wiggum:Okay, drop the knife, Stabitha!

Bart:I can't go to juvie. They use guys like me as currency!

Lou:Yeah. They'll pass you around like- Well, like currency, like you said.

Bart · Chief Wiggum:'Hootie and the Blowfish'? / Yeah. It's cheaper than blank tape.

Bart · Chief Wiggum:'Hootie and the Blowfish'? / Yeah. It's cheaper than blank tape.

Linguo:Bad grammar overload! Error! Error! [Explosion]

Fat Tony:He once pulled a slug out of my arm and inserted it into a stoolie's brain.

Bart:Boy, this sure was one crazy day.

Bart:Boy, this sure was one crazy day.