Blame It On Lisa

Homer:D'oh!

Scratchy:Nice follow-through!

Itchy:Now that's what I call a moon shot.

Lisa · Homer:Dad, that line was in the cartoon. I'm pretty sure it wasn't.

Homer · Bart:Boy, did you make a prank call to Brazil? No, sir. I didn't. Choke on your lies!

Marge:Which phone company? There are hundreds of them. And they all keep changing their names.

Homer · Marge · Lisa:I think we're with Comquaaq. No, I think its Niagular. No, last week they became Vertiqual.

Homer · Phone operator:Wow. Everything is so high-tech. Dialing Murray Hill, 5-6-3-0-9. So, I says to Myrna, I says, 'That guy's a bum!'

Movie Phone:Thank you for dating Mr. Movie Phone. Our evening will be rated R, for brief nudity.

Lindsay Naegle:I'm a sexual predator.

Marge · Homer:Fine! I'll cut off your ponytail! Homer! Marge, it's called negotiating.

Marge · Homer:Why must you fight with every utility? I told you, I have too much time on my hands.

Carl/Lenny:We tried, but a recording said you were a bunch of deadbeats.

Homer:That's it! They have awoken a sleeping giant. Crazy scheme, crazy scheme, crazy scheme. Get me tools and beer! Yes!

Homer:Let's try the red one... Let's try them together... How did I get here?

Homer:Let's try the red one again. Oh, not again!

Homer · Lisa:The one I didn't make and Marge didn't make and Bart didn't make and hence, no one in the house made. Uh-oh.

Homer:Don't you know the boys from Brazil are little Hitlers? I saw it in a movie, whose name I can't remember!

Lisa · Homer:Well, then they started pressuring me for more donations, and you can't hang up on a nun. That's right. They have powers.

Marge · Homer:Aw! He's so adorable. Can we have another baby? No way! I still haven't lost the weight I put on from the last one.

Ronaldo:Now the monkeys cannot bite me. I am like sugar to them.

Homer · Lisa:How many people live in Brazil? A hundred and fifty-six million. D'oh!

Bart:Fine. I want to meet monkeys.

Marge:It's really cheap if we change planes in Phoenix, Honolulu, Sun City and East Saint Louis, spend a night in a haunted house and leave right now.

Homer:And I'll have been on every continent. Except Antarctica. The Simpsons are going to Antarctica next year. This year, Brazil.

Homer · Marge:Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. So, in August, it's cold? That's right. And in February, it's hot? So, it's opposite land! Crooks chase cops, cats have puppies.

Lisa · Homer:No, Dad. It's just the weather. So, hot snow falls up? Yes. Woo-hoo!

Lisa · Homer · Bart:Well done, Bart. But in Brazil, they speak Portuguese. Forget every word, boy. It's useless. But, Homer... I said forget it! All gone.

Flight attendant · Fernando:Fernando, you make that joke every time. It was that joke that made you fall in love with me.

Homer:Wow. It's like he's on the dashboard of the entire country.

Homer:Take me to the hotel / My hands are on a guy's ass / Boy, this dude must work out

Homer:Look, Marge. I'm Brazilian!

Bart:Bert and Ernie left it to your imagination.

Homer:I'm Chiquita Banana and I'm here to say / I will eat this Toblerone and I will not pay

Marge · Lisa · Homer:What a charming neighborhood. Mom, these are slums. The government just painted them bright colors so the tourists wouldn't be offended. Works for me.

Homer:There he is! Oh, wait. You said brown hair, right?

Homer:Ooh! They look like Skittles!

Marge · Nun:Have you tried looking for him? That's plan B.

Homer · Nun:Can you fly me over town to look for him? We nuns cannot fly. Oh, too much junk in the trunk, eh? Yes.

Lisa · Marge · Homer:You know I'm a vegetarian. But you're on vacation, honey. I'm not wearing my wedding ring.

Brazilian · Homer:Excuse me, Americans! How did you know?

Homer · Beach vendor:How did you know? There is a dress code on this beach. But we can help you.

Marge · Homer:I feel so European. Huh. Mine keeps disappearing.

Homer · Bart:I'm in Rio / and I'm walking on the beach / I'm in my Speedo / No! No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Samba instructor:We are now developing our most powerful dance, the penetrada. It makes sex look like a church!

Samba instructor:You can't protect her forever! You stupid lady!

Brazilian man · Homer:Ronaldo? You know him? No, no. I was just distracting you while my children robbed you.

Taxi driver · Homer:My American friend, I'm afraid that this is a kidnapping. So that means I don't have to pay the fare? I suppose... Woo-hoo!

Homer:No. It smells like cinnamon.

Homer · Kidnapper:I have a bladder the size of a Brazil nut. We just call them nuts here.

Teleboobies:Clockwise! Counter-clockwise.

Lisa · Marge:Kidnapped. Oh, my God! What are we supposed to do? I don't know. Wait for the call.

Detective · Marge:I don't think there is a boy or a husband! I think you have a thing for me. I've been shot!

Homer:I don't know. They've been seeing me alive for free for a long time.

Kidnapper:That's very nice, honey. That'll buy you one of my legs or something they call a mystery bag.

Mr. Burns:Hmm. Well, I'm high on sheep embryos, so I am feeling charitable.

Homer · Moe:Hey, Moe. Homer, listen. I need 50 grand. Don't ask me why. No, no. I need 50 grand! I asked you first! Fine. I'll send you 50 grand. Thanks.

Homer:Go suck a Bible!

Carnival performer:You cannot run from Carnival! Because even running is a kind of dance!

Carnival participant:You cannot run from Carnival! Because even running is a kind of dance!

Ronaldo · Lisa:But I didn't know what state you lived in. It's a bit of a mystery, yes.

Ronaldo:I make as much as Malcolm in the Middle. And because I have no parents, my earnings remain unstolen.

Homer · Kidnapper:Listen, I made a little scrapbook to remember the kidnapping. Look. This is that cigarette butt you burned me with. You slept like a baby that night.

Lisa · Homer:He has the Stockholm syndrome. He has come to identify with his captors. They let me stay up all night!

Homer:Look at all that pink and purple. Our money sure is gay.

Kidnapper:It was Homer's idea. You say no to that face.

Homer:Because I've learned that no matter how bad I screw up, you'll always bail me out.

Homer:Don't be sad. It's Carnival! Whoopee!