Im Spelling As Fast As I Can

Booberella:Frankenstein and the Harlem Globetrotters Meet the Mummy and the Washington Generals

Booberella:If you watch closely... you might recognize a young Ray Romano

Homer:Homer grunting and presumably adjusting himself after sitting down

Frankenstein:Don't blame Frankenstein. Me made from corpses of Denver Nuggets.

Booberella:Now for the first of our 82 commercial breaks. Then you can see more of my boobs.

Marge:It's nice to see a realistic single woman on TV.

Apu:Please don't beat me up any more.

Commercial announcer:We start with authentic letter-graded meat... and process the hell out of it till it's good enough for Krusty.

Krusty:I don't mind the taste.

Homer:Wow, I can't wait to pack that into my colon.

Bart:Dude, take it easy on the fatty foods. You're running out of leg veins to transplant into your heart.

Homer:I got arm veins, don't I?

Groundskeeper Willie:This year, he gets it in the back.

Principal Skinner:At ease, Cadet Nelson. Good to be back on terra firma, eh?

Nelson:How about I launch my foot into your butt?

Principal Skinner:I held your hair when you barfed in the simulator.

Student:My dad says you were a busboy.

Principal Skinner:You mean your dad, the raging alcoholic?

Student:Come on, man. Everyone knows the first day of school is a total wank.

Principal Skinner:Well, if by wank you mean educational fun... then stand back, it's wanking time.

Nelson:Bart said I am pee. He's made of pee.

Bart:Well, I got my laugh. I'm out of here.

Nelson:I made Bart in my pants.

Milhouse:Oh, I know this one. It's so easy. F-- Oh, man!

Principal Skinner:Stop laughing. It will scar him for life.

Principal Skinner:It is kind of infectious.

Nelson · Student:Hey, Lisa said she was-- Unh, shut up, Pee.

Lisa:Free Tibet!

Lisa:This is just a kickball with 'Mars' written on it.

Principal Skinner:Behold, the Red Planet.

Homer:I see no evidence of water.

Homer:Face it, they're doomed.

Homer:But I've been fooled by so many people in costumes.

Ribwich mascot:Try the sauce. I'm soaked in it.

Homer:I could lick you all day long. And yet my children think I'm a failure.

Homer reading sign:Now without lettuce.

Homer:I have eaten the ribs of God.

Spelling bee moderator:Nothing can ameliorate the ineptitude of Principal Skinner.

Principal Skinner:I wish he wouldn't use me in every example.

Lisa's cheering section:Diphthongs, cognates, Latin roots / Lisa clobbers all you fruits

Homer:Finally, a Simpson has a trophy without a bowling ball on it.

Homer:That sounds like a magical family moment. I'm sorry I won't be there.

Homer:Oh, sweetie. You're the most important thing to me in the world.

Homer:Only very serious daddy business can tear me from your side.

Homer:Three Ribwiches, please. And instead of a shake, I'd like a blended Ribwich.

Homer:Not again. First, you took away my Philly Fudge Steak... and then my Bacon Balls, then my Watcha-ma-chicken.

Homer · Ribheads:I could follow the Ribwich from town to town. That's what we do. We're Ribheads.

Ribhead:If you like the Ribwich, not very.

Groundskeeper Willie · Principal Skinner:Your effects have been moved to Willie's shack. Come along, lad. And lose your books. They won't help you where you're going.

News anchor:3M and M&M have merged to form, get this, Ultradyne Systems

News anchor:3M and M&M have merged... to form, get this, Ultradyne Systems.

News anchor:In a related story, the Spellympics is being sued by the Olympics... for use of the suffix 'lympics.'

News anchor:This has gotta be the slowest news day ever. Ah, that's better. Paris is no more.

Homer · Moe:Well, what about in the sentence 'Jim Nabors is way cool'? It's on my apron.

Cletus's family:Rubella, we got you a middle name.

Hillbilly · Lisa:Can you spell 'scabies'? / S-C-A-B-I-E-S. / Rubella, we got you a middle name

Cletus:Uh-uh. You forgot the lightning bolt.

Barney:That's what beer has done to me.

Lisa:Perhaps one day, people who spell correctly... will replace athletes at the top of our national pantheon. Boo! Ha, ha, I was just K-I-D-D-I-N-G.

Moe:Hey, spell 'Little Miss She-Thinks-She's-So-Big.'

George Plimpton:I also played the evil dean in Boner Academy.

Audience member · George Plimpton:You monster. Why did you expel Boogerman? He replaced my tennis racket with a rubber phallus. Ha, ha, that was awesome.

Student · Plimpton:You monster. Why did you expel Boogerman? / He replaced my tennis racket with a rubber phallus

Alex · Lisa:Ha, ha, he's an acerose. Really? He possesses the properties of a pine needle?

Alex:Look, I didn't bring a Game Boy. This is all I got.

Audience member:He's adorable. I'd sure like to tuck that in at night.

Homer:It's not just a sandwich. It's about brotherhood. It's about freedom. It's about three days since I've had one.

Homer:I'm getting the shakes and I'm getting the fries.

Lisa:Then I'll be queen of the world! Of spelling.

George Plimpton:'Look at me, I'm a drug addict. Ho, ho, ho.'

Lisa:Some of us still enjoy scripted comedy, sir.

Spelling official:Women in the audience toss their thick glasses at him

George Plimpton:And a hot plate. It's perfect for soup.

Seven Sisters colleges:Give in, Lisa. Get a free ride. And a hot plate.

Lisa · Marge:But you don't play the piano. I just gotta stay one lesson ahead of the kid.

Milhouse:I know this is a fantasy, but I'll take it. No! I'll never be this happy again!

Ribheads:Hey, man, can you turn me on? Hey, don't borgnine my sandwich.

Krusty Burger executive · Ribheads:The animal we made them from is now extinct. The pig? The cow? You're way off. Think smaller. Think more legs.

Homer:Welcome to the real world, hippies.

Homer · Other person:Fighting over a stupid sandwich on my daughter's big day? Mister, I'll take that car.

Homer:I have the buyer's remorse.

Spelling moderator:I don't know whether the weather will improve

Spelling bee moderator:Alex, your word is 'rigged'... as in, 'This contest is rigged.'

Spelling bee moderator:The little girl's intransigence cost her the college of her choice.

Spelling moderator:The little girl's intransigence cost her the college of her choice

Homer:Daddy made it for your dance recital, honey. Now super size it.

George Plimpton · Lisa:You fool, it's E-N-C-E. Oh, my God, you're right. I spelled it wrong.

Homer:You're the number one speller in this car, or in that car... or in that car, or-- Don't look at that car.

Homer:Don't look at that car

Principal Skinner:Before you, it was the woman who dated Charles Grodin.