Moe Baby Blues

Homer · Family:Homer laughs at a sign and asks if anyone wants to know why it's funny

Homer · Lisa:Homer always picks seven because 'there were seven apostles'

Homer:'Boy, that's a big staff. And still he wasn't that funny.'

Homer:Stupid prey. They never suspect anything... Ooh, a hotdog. [HOMER GRUNTING]

Moe:'Flower power my ass.'

Moe:'Hey, those are my customers-slash-only friends.'

Moe:'I've been replaced by a cooler?'

Security Guard:Someone who's alone, already bitter... someone who's been trampled on so many times... one more won't make any... Oh, Moe.

Moe:'I'd prefer that you push me... seeing how I'm desperate for any human contact.'

Bart:'Oh, man. The plant cut one.'

Moe:'That smells worse than James Coco's ski boots.'

Moe:Moe thinks he's found someone worse off than him (a baby in a carriage) but the mother appears

Homer · Unknown:'Well, at least we're outside instead of sitting at home watching TV.' 'I hear that. Hey, that car has a TV in it.'

Granny (TV):'Well, now it's a didgeri-don't.'

Homer:'A dream deferred is a dream denied.'

Woman:'That hideous man is a hero.'

Lisa:'They're standing up with no one in them.'

Moe:'What's the gag? Is it full of chiggers?'

Moe:Aw, jeez, there's something in my eye. Oh, it's just some glass.

Grampa:'The Swedish are coming! The Swedish are coming!'

Grampa:'Look at me, I'm Speedy Alka Seltzer. Whoa!'

Grampa:Look at me, I'm Speedy Alka Seltzer. Whoa!

Moe · Maggie:Moe dislocates his arm to entertain Maggie

Moe:'Raggedy Andy over there has been giving you the button eye.'

Moe:'You know, it gave me kind of a good, warm feeling... like when you get drunk and fall asleep in snow.'

Moe:'I was gonna erase those apostrophes and replace them with G's.'

Moe:Why's she crying? Oh, that's right. I still got her nose. Here you go, you little idiot.

Moe · Woman:'You calling her repellent?' / 'You ain't Karen Allen yourself, you know?'

Homer · Bart:'Hey, wait. That's supposed to be me.' / 'You could be my father figure.' / 'No way. I'm not getting my fingerprints on that train wreck.'

Homer:'I said pipe down, Amtrak.'

Moe:Maggie, look what's in your ear. A penny. Okay, we won't tell no one about that.

Elmo Doll:'No means no for Elmo.'

Moe:'This must be a takeoff on that Alice in Underpants movie I saw.'

Moe:Ha. It's nice to be with someone... who can't understand the horrible things I say.

Moe:'White rabbit, chicks popping mushrooms? This is like the Playboy Mansion.'

Moe:'We could scare that movie producer... by putting a horse's blanket in his bed.' / 'Imagine waking up and seeing you got the wrong blanket.'

Moe · Maggie:Moe puts orange in his mouth like Vito Corleone and growls at Maggie

Moe:'And he shuts the door on Annie Hall.'

Moe:'Yeah, sure he was, Nahasapasa-I'm-Raising-A-Pervert.'

Homer:[SINGING] The squirmy wormy spider Squirts out of Daddy's hands Daddy feels rejected He's gonna eat some cake

Moe:'Yeah, great present, Selma. Nice of you to break a five.'

Selma:'Ah, get a neck, Frankenstein.'

Homer:'I recorded that for private use.'

Moe:'Yeah, I had to. It's so weird watching the video and not getting any sound.'

Marge · Moe:You have your own baby monitor in our child's room? Yeah, I had to. It's so weird watching the video and not getting any sound.

Moe:'Last night at the bar, you called her Raquel.'

Moe:'Is that, uh, "get out" like "leave"? Or "get out" as in, "Get out, you banged Bridget Fonda?"'

Moe:'You guys mind if I, uh, kiss your tummies?'

Homer:What are you screaming about? Did you discover my snake farm? Because I can explain. I'm going to farm and sell snakes.

Chief Wiggum:'I mean, freeze, scumbag. You can't write stuff like that.'

Chief Wiggum:'No. Now that I'm off duty, I'm the world's worst soccer coach. Ha.'

Moe:Here's a clue. A discarded orange wedge. Orange wedge? [GROWLING]

Moe:'I'm president of the Italian-American Anti-Defamation League. And this really burns my cannoli.'

Moe:'Gee, ha. This is the second most guns ever pointed at me.'

Mobster:'I ain't cried like this since I paid to see Godfather III.'

Moe:'Oh, great. I'm caught in another tree.'