Selina helps monitor the first free and democratic election in Georgia (the country, not the state) and is reunited with an old "friend." Meanwhile, Mike and Gary hide evidence of a major mishap, and Jonah and Richard have an eventful night out. Back in the U.S., Dan tries to help Amy.
Veep's Georgia episode sustains 2.22 jokes per minute through pure character escalation.
Directed by Becky Martin · Written by Billy Kimball
WAR
83.6
Wins Above Replacement
“Georgia” ranks #25 of 65 Veep episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 81.5 — Elite. The episode packs 80 scored jokes at 2.2 per minute, averaging 7.2 on craft and 6.9 on impact, with Selina landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
As clear as the coffee table Danny Thomas had his hookers shit on. / It's an American expression.
Selina Absurdist Misdirection ★ Rewatch I will destroy you in ways that are so creative, they will honor me for it at the Kennedy Center.
Selina Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch May I say that the reports of your beauty have not been exaggerated. / Well, back at you, red.
Eat the soup. / Why? / Because I'm hungry. I need to know if it's been poisoned.
It's now worth approximately $389,000. Way to go, ma'am.
Kent Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 80 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ mad-lab-blah. - Madloba.
Selina Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun Jesus, democracy. What a horror show this is.
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch I didn't even know Georgia was a country.
Selina Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Hello! One day, you can grow up to be president. No, not you. Your brother.
Unbelievable.
Selina Reaction Beat Deadpan/Understatement This place sucks my ghost nard.
Selina Absurdist Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Hawaii is rightfully a monarchy and will be again.
spreading democracy like patient zero
Selina Dark/Subversive Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Sex trafficking workshop. / It's an anti-sex trafficking workshop. / Lame.
Look at us, just like the good, old days except shittier in every conceivable way.
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Observational Maybe we can win an election for a change. / That came out wrong. / Yeah, way wrong, right?
It's gotta be 8:00 AM somewhere.
Selina Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Jailbait statesman.
Selina Wordplay/Pun Dark/Subversive Night and fog. Nacht und Nebel.
Ben Dark/Subversive Character Comedy I will destroy you in ways that are so creative, they will honor me for it at the Kennedy Center.
Selina Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch I am gonna find ways to destroy you so hard that everybody at the Kennedy Center is gonna take a fucking massive shit.
Selina Escalation Callback Callback I already have 434 brand-new best friends and we're all going to dinner tonight. And you're not invited. Sorry. Congressmen only.
Ryan Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm I got a Georgian SIM card. Got text forwarding. I'll here from you?
Richard Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun That's not the Buddy Calhoun I see in the mirror. Although, it would be if you stepped out of the shower.
I'm happiest when Buddy and I are on the couch eating popcorn and watching 'Downton Abbey.' / Can we play that again?
Ames, who's your favorite character on 'Downton'? I don't know. Abby, I guess. Yep.
Danny Amy Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch I don't know. Abby, I guess.
Amy Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement You have a doctrine now? What is it, 'Boners are rare, don't waste them'?
Selina Setup/Punchline Character Comedy ★ Rewatch It was a spa. / No, no, a spa is where you go to get a massage and the like. You were in an insane asylum.
We are, in fact, lovers. / What? / Lovers. / Lovers. / With Scab Calloway?
I went to find a hotel room, right? Nobody speaks English here, everything was really confusing to me, and I was chased by children. And I think I may have voted.
Mike Escalation Absurdist ★ Rewatch Mike, that is the kind of voting irregularity that we are here to prevent.
Kent Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement I accidentally voted and now my thumb is green. - The same thing happened to me! Oh, my God! - Oh, my God, oh, my God.
The same thing happened to me! Oh, my God! / Oh, my God, oh, my God. / How did it happen?
I can't afford to lose this job, Gary, but I can't afford to keep it either. I mean, it so expensive to commute from DC. And I haven't been paid yet.
Mike Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm I never ever wanna see the inside of your mouth again. Okay? It looks like a Haitian porta-potty in there.
Selina Setup/Punchline Dark/Subversive Hey, Gary, can I sleep on your couch? - No. - Hard no? - It's a hard no.
Yeah, but do we really want these people to have electricity?
Selina Dark/Subversive Character Comedy Jesus, you and Doyle really have a wide-on for this guy.
Selina Wordplay/Pun Character Comedy Well, it's a miracle that anybody survives eating sushi in this country, Minna.
Selina Setup/Punchline Observational I cannot possibly accept that. - I mean, even the appearance of a quid pro quo...
As clear as the coffee table Danny Thomas had his hookers shit on. / It's an American expression.
Selina Absurdist Misdirection ★ Rewatch I will give you my sperm. / Oh, great! / Yeah. / I thought that would take a lot longer.
Okay, uh, could we start the clock in, like, 30 minutes? / Yeah, I guess so. / Actually, no. No, make it 40. The girl I'm thinking of likes to talk first.
Dan Escalation Character Comedy I'd kill for a job where I could wear flats all day.
Selina Character Comedy Observational That's keep a lot of docents in Rockports. / I'd kill for a job where I could wear flats all day.
There is literally no Georgian law. / And I'm using 'literally' correctly.
Ben Meta/Self-Referential Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch There is literally no Georgian law. And I'm using 'literally' correctly.
Ben Character Comedy Meta/Self-Referential ★ Rewatch Yeah, that and a car with a sunroof could've bought you my virginity in '83. / You were 22? / No, I was 15 in 1983.
Yeah, that and a car with a sunroof could've bought you my virginity in '83. - You were 22? - No, I was 15 in 1983.
Yeah, that and a car with a sunroof could've bought you my virginity in '83. - You were 22?
Did he throw himself from a moving town car? / No. No, he weighted his boots and he jumped into an ice hole.
Your noses must've been really tiny yesterday because you lied and now they're normal-sized.
Ryan Setup/Punchline Wordplay/Pun In the immortal words of will.i.am, 'Tonight's gonna be really great!'
Ryan Character Comedy Absurdist In the immortal words of will.i.am, 'Tonight's gonna be really great!'
Ryan Character Comedy Absurdist Fuck. - Are you fucking...?! - That's where that goes? - Pick up your fucking chairs!
Various Physical/Slapstick Escalation Oh, you must remember not to react to his disfigurement. He's very sensitive. - Wait, how bad is it, exactly? - Oh, well, he was very handsome before the poisoning, so you may not even notice it.
May I say that the reports of your beauty have not been exaggerated. / Well, back at you, red.
Well, back at you, red.
Selina Character Comedy Reaction Beat ★ Rewatch I mean, you know, who needs all that champagne when you can have all these different kinds of wallpaper?
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Observational I mean, you know, who needs all that champagne when you can have all these different kinds of wallpaper?
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy His very touch makes me quiver. / Okay, and now we get to eat food.
Eat the soup. / Why? / Because I'm hungry. I need to know if it's been poisoned.
Oh, it has carrots in it. I'm not gonna eat that.
Selina Character Comedy Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch I agree. It is so much less than you are worth.
To ensure fair election, I would like to offer you a $15 million bribe. - How dare you, sir!
but unbelievably shitty apartment.
Selina Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement If you told him that rava ganavlis was chakapuli, he would eat it up and ask for seconds.
If you told him that rava ganavlis was chakapuli, he would eat it up and ask for seconds. / I can only hope that rava ganavlis is human shit. / It is actually what you vomit after eating shit.
You know, the band's name translates to Panzer Division. - What?
Richard Dan Dark/Subversive Character Comedy ★ Rewatch The poison? It did not engorge only his face, if you know what I mean. / I think I do. / It also engorged his penis and made it very unusual texture of sea cucumber, so it's great for vaginal orgasms.
You know, I just come and get it over with.
Selina Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Which do you prefer, vaginal or clitoral orgasms? - You know, I just come and get it over with.
You two ding-dongs look like you fingered the Incredible Hulk.
Selina Setup/Punchline Absurdist ★ Rewatch Murman's leading by more votes than there are people in the country. - Yeah, maybe he's bussing them in from Chicago.
This election's going down like Eleanor Roosevelt at Dinah Shore Weekend.
Selina Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun ★ Rewatch Well, Murman, that is a big tire with a fuckload of fish in it.
Selina Callback Escalation Callback Well, Murman, that is a big tire with a fuckload of fish in it.
Selina Callback Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Callback My concern is I wonder if your judgment is being clouded by your feelings that are brought on by Nikolai's lumpy poison cock.
Selina Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Yeah, in Finland, we call this the fever of the sausage.
Minna Absurdist Character Comedy Sometimes I don't feel worthy of this friendship. / Mm, well, sometimes I feel that way, too.
Wow, that's like Gary becoming president. / From the tea party. / No. Oh, yeah, that is funny.
It's now worth approximately $389,000. Way to go, ma'am.
Kent Deadpan/Understatement Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Way to go, ma'am.
Gary Irony/Sarcasm Deadpan/Understatement And that, in a nutshell, is what I call the Meyer Doctrine.
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Callback Callback 