Selina evaluates her past and present campaigns. Jonah's personal life sparks interest among the press. Amy makes an important decision.
Season finale opener fumbles momentum: 74.9 score marks series' lowest-density premiere.
Directed by David Mandel · Written by Lew Morton
WAR
51.7
Wins Above Replacement
“Iowa” ranks #56 of 65 Veep episodes on the Humor Index, scoring 74.9 — Great. The episode packs 63 scored jokes at 1.5 per minute, averaging 7.1 on craft and 6.6 on impact, with Selina landing the most laughs. Every joke is ranked below with its individual craft and impact scores.
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Top Jokes
Muslim or white guy? - Don't know yet. - Which is better for me? - White guy. - Fingers crossed.
Twenty-seven people have been killed. - Oh, my God. - Hohhh. - This can... work for us?
If Mohamad Atta had you people booking his travel, he'd still be alive today. Which from his perspective, would be a massive fuck-up.
Selina Dark/Subversive Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch I took a dump on the glass ceiling, and I shaved my muff in the sink of the old boys' club.
Selina Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch America owes me an eight-year stay in the White House, and this time, I want a war!
Selina Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch All Jokes — 63 analyzed
Show all ↓ Hide ↑ I hate this country.
Selina Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch Yes, your stay in the insane asylum? It's really agreed with you. - Oh, it was a spa.
Selina Meyer travels the globe, spreading democracy like patient zero.
No justice, no library!
Selina Wordplay/Pun Absurdist ★ Rewatch White working-class voters.
Ben Deadpan/Understatement Observational Well, second time's the charm. - Uh, it's actually the fourth. - Yeah, fourth time's the charm.
I don't really get it, actually.
Mike Deadpan/Understatement Reaction Beat Strategic Hypermetric Electoral Interactive Logistical Algorithm.
Kent Character Comedy Wordplay/Pun I like her more than I like the deaf girl. - Whatever happened to her? - The police have no leads.
Kent Amy Kent Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch This isn't a Terrence Malick movie. Sit.
Amy Observational Irony/Sarcasm ★ Rewatch What? Jesus, I thought you sent that thing to the 7-Eleven dumpster in the sky already.
Selina Cringe/Discomfort Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch Waitin' for the thing to get into fucking college?! What are you doing?!
I don't know what she's saying, so... here.
Selina Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort If you want me to use my own goddamn words, then write me something to say.
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Absurdist ★ Rewatch And take out the stuff about immigration 'cause I feel like it's a little too issue-y.
Selina Character Comedy Absurdist Right now I'm standing here, with my dick in my hand, in Cedar... Falls, Iowa!
Gary Physical/Slapstick Cringe/Discomfort If Mohamad Atta had you people booking his travel, he'd still be alive today. Which from his perspective, would be a massive fuck-up.
Selina Dark/Subversive Setup/Punchline ★ Rewatch Muslim or white guy? - Don't know yet. - Which is better for me? - White guy. - Fingers crossed.
What dumb asshole said that?
Selina Irony/Sarcasm Character Comedy ★ Rewatch How about I write 500 pages about how you need to start wearing concealer?
Selina Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Two wheelchair guys behind him? What, we didn't get the point with the first one?
Selina Observational Cringe/Discomfort One wheelchair guy, good for you, two wheelchair guys, shame on me.
You're supposed to say, 'That's not our plan.'
What are you supposed to say then when the baby is being an asshole? For instance.
Selina Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Catherine is Mama, and I'm Mom-Mom. - You didn't want to go with Mommy and Agent Palmiotti?
How can you tell? - Well, the haircut.
We still enjoy sex in the mornings, but in the evenings, hardly ever. And rarely penetrative.
Blue is the Most Annoying Color.
Amy Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch So I can nuke America. - That's actually not bad.
Amy Leon Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement Why was six afraid of seven? Why? Because of my seven-eight-nine tax plan.
Jonah Wordplay/Pun Cringe/Discomfort You know what I always thought the funniest number was? Eleven.
Jonah Absurdist Character Comedy Yeah, Beth's my stepsister. - Did you guys not know that?
Jonah Escalation Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch It's not like Beth and I did anything, unless you count her walking in while I was whackin' off all the time.
Jonah Cringe/Discomfort Escalation Because of my court-ordered chemical castration.
Teddy Dark/Subversive Deadpan/Understatement ★ Rewatch This doin' anything for you? Huh, right there? You like that? Not even a little tickle?
Jonah Cringe/Discomfort Physical/Slapstick I didn't have my breakfast this morning, I will admit, so that makes me quite hungry.
Selina Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy My heart goes out to the families of the victims, and I want to offer them my, uh... mindfulness... and, uh, meditations un-unto the Lord
Selina Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy Even the name sounds like it's on meth.
Selina Observational Character Comedy 'Boasters are roasters,' my Grandma Splett would always say. She had a form of rhyming dementia. It's called Lyndrome Syndrome.
Richard Absurdist Character Comedy ★ Rewatch Richard, is chocolate bad for dogs? - Oh, no, not bad. Deadly.
You love standing next to ugly women.
Amy Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort Ma'am, you're thinking of Idaho. Iowa is mostly meth labs.
Gary Observational Deadpan/Understatement That's mainly just a difference in branding.
Selina Dark/Subversive Observational ★ Rewatch I thought Keith Quinn was someone else!
Selina Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy This is a really big step up for me.
Keith Irony/Sarcasm Cringe/Discomfort It's not like I murdered her.
Jonah Dark/Subversive Cringe/Discomfort I married my half-sister. - No, stepsister!
She doesn't give birth to a pile of legs or whatever.
Jonah Cringe/Discomfort Absurdist I haven't eaten all day.
Keith Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy I don't want people to think that I was going for Mee-gan Ee-gan because that sounds like someone who gets ass-fucked on the Major Deegan in a limerick.
Amy Wordplay/Pun Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch To give it to you, of course.
Gary Character Comedy Deadpan/Understatement I took a dump on the glass ceiling, and I shaved my muff in the sink of the old boys' club.
Selina Character Comedy Cringe/Discomfort ★ Rewatch America owes me an eight-year stay in the White House, and this time, I want a war!
Selina Character Comedy Dark/Subversive ★ Rewatch It sounds like I'm shouting from a balcony in Munich. - Like Evita!
My spidey sense tells me she's gonna yelp like a seagull in a bread factory.
Dan Observational Character Comedy ★ Rewatch If you wanna go Dutch or whatever on the abortion, just hit me up on Venmo, OK? Oh, you know what? Make it public, OK? Shows I'm a gentleman.
Dan Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy This place has feminine symbolism spurtin' out of its dickhole.
Selina Wordplay/Pun Cringe/Discomfort Prancing in here with this la-dee-da attitude and total 'disregahd' for the working class people of this country
Actually, it's a synecdoche. - Technically, it's more of a goat rape than a clusterfuck.
Ben Kent Wordplay/Pun Escalation ★ Rewatch Twenty-seven people have been killed. - Oh, my God. - Hohhh. - This can... work for us?
We have to send that shooter a nice thank-you card. - Actually, he shot himself before he could be apprehended. - I'll send something to his wife. - Oh. Actually, he shot her first.
Those hands are for making me Hot Pockets and nothing else.
Jonah Cringe/Discomfort Character Comedy The field could not be any clearer.
Ben Irony/Sarcasm Observational