Lisa

Lisa:Terms of Endearment, Fried Green Tomatoes...and The Joy Luck Club. Shall I get us some hankies?

Lisa:I want you to meet my father.

Lisa:Well, before you and I get into a little one on one...you're gonna have to talk to the head coach.

Lisa:Sorry I'm late...but after I left church, I went down and read some books to the elderly.

Will · Lisa:Yo, man, where Helen at? / She's probably at the chiropractor.

Will · Lisa:Well, if you like this one, wait till you see the sequel. / You are a dog. [WILL BARKS]

Lisa · Will:Do I look like a fool to you? / No, not a fool.

Will · Lisa:Ugh! I cannot believe you sorority girls could be so devious. / It was actually your cousin Carlton's idea.

Lisa · Will:You don't care. / You're damn right I don't care. You damn near fricasseed me.

Lisa · Will:Oh, Casablanca always makes me cry. / Oh, good. I thought it was me.

Lisa · Will:I wonder why you don't see a lot of black professional bowlers. / Ain't no money in it. Look... how much dough could a brother make endorsing a pair of these?

Will · Lisa:Girl, you just won yourself a date to a carnival with an ebony god. / Really? / I'd rather go with you.

Lisa · Will:Baby, you were on the floor. / That's how I fight.

Lisa · Will:Will, you shouldn't be threatened by my knowledge of shotokan. / Whoa, whoa, whoa. First, I don't care if you know Chaka Khan. I ain't threatened by nobody.

Lisa · Carlton:Carlton, can I confide in you? / I feel it too, Lisa. / Feel what? / Never mind.

Lisa · Will:You'd rather a guy bash your face in... than to have a woman who likes this face... step in and save it? / Finally you understand.

Lisa:Shouldn't you be out fighting crime?

Will · Lisa:I was trying to fight Akira's dragon. Only the dragon was from without. / Without what? / That's the same place the whole thing fell apart for me too.

Lisa:You know, you're not doing a very good job.

Will · Lisa:Now you're in trouble sequence and kiss

Will · Lisa:Number four: Get naked. What? WILL: No, my fault. I was just kidding.

Lisa:Let things flow naturally, right? Where did you hear that crock of garbage?

Lisa:You're just too damn lovable.

Lisa:Uh, Daddy, remember Craig?

Lisa:Same game, next season.

Will · Lisa:Like, take this jacket you're wearing. What about this jacket? I love it

Lisa:Will, did you take another one of those yellow pills?

Will · Lisa:WILL & LISA: Don't touch that!

Lisa:Don't wanna get what? A ticket. I'm double-parked outside.

Will · Lisa:Well, stupid is as stupid does. Well, what is that supposed to mean? I don't know, but the movie made like a half a billion dollars.

Lisa:Baby, I don't wanna have to shoot you every six months just to hold on to you.

Will · Lisa:You wouldn't really bust a cap at me, though, would you? Not unless I have to.

Lisa:My living room. Thanks to you, my apartment is flooded.

Will · Lisa:[LISA & WILL GRUNT] Hey, baby, what's Swahili for 'ching-ching'?

Lisa · Will:Cleveland. / Philly.

Lisa:Will who?

Lisa:Trust me, the next time I decide to take something off... you will be too old and blind to care.

Lisa:So you expect me to be a gourmet chef, raise eight kids... and look beautiful 24 hours a day?

Lisa:That one-figure salary that you pull down at the Peacock?

Lisa:Because your name is on the seat.

Lisa:[IMITATING WILL] Who the man? I'm the man.

Lisa:Because I ain't spending no 4.95 on some stank skeezer... to take her to the salad bar.

Lisa:That's from the travel agent. She says she could retire on this one. Ha-ha-ha.

Lisa:Well, okay, baby, but I don't wanna be given away by the pimp.

Lisa:Well, you seem like you're doing a pretty good job to me right now.

Will · Lisa:You know, if somebody was to walk in here right now... they might think you was hitting on me. / Trust me, if I was hitting on you, you'd know It.

Will · Lisa:Really? How? / [Kiss demonstration] / Okay, you made your point.

Lisa:I don't know. Can he take a punch? I'm kidding, I'm kidding. No, seriously, can he?

Will · Lisa:What the hell is that? Hi. See? I knew she was gonna say that.

Lisa:Or one of them's dead and one of them's a fugitive.

Lisa:Baby, I hate sweet potato pie.

Lisa:But personally, I think the guy's a lowlife slug whose whole sexual identity is an extension of his big, stupid gun.

Lisa · Will:I think he's gay. Ah!

Will · Lisa:Your name is Lisa, isn't it? Well, it is now. I just couldn't go through life hearing people say, 'Hey, Beula.'

Will · Lisa:Hey, hey, girl! This ain't no time to be getting freaky. Will, I was trying to hold your hand. Oh, yeah? Well, that wasn't it.