Coworker

Sorry, I don't know any Earl. I'm right here!

Not on purpose. He ricocheted off you and got me.

She's a friend of mine and I made this big stink...about how awful these massage chains are. -Then why do you work here?

Well, I think this is a great place to work. Okay, are they listening?

Dartmouth? Who went to Dartmouth? Dartmouth sucks! You go to Dartmouth? No, sir. There you go! Ha-ha-ha.