Gossip

Parkour! - Michael-- - Parkour! Parkour! - Extreme! Parkour! - Parkour!

So technically they are doing parkour As long as point 'a' is delusn and point 'b' is the hospital.

Truck to refrigerators to dumpster, 360 spin onto the pallets, backflip gainer Into the trash can.

Parkour.

Go put them all in random order. Then come back here For your next assignment concerning their order.

He didn't do anything sexual. He just made far, far too many monica lewinsky jokes.

If they get married before i do, i'm gonna kill myself.

This place is like spaniard fly.

Wait, there's not gonna be a shotgun? - Nope. - No shotgun? 'cause that changes everything.

Free at last. Free at last.

I guess i have a face you can trust. I think it's because of my low cheekbones.

I should have known. Poopball?

She said the third wheel is what makes it a tricycle.

Stanley was with his wife. I waved at him but he didn't wave back.

Stanley is way past the middle of his life, Especially considering his height to weight ratio.

If that was his sister, then what they were doing was totally illegal.

It is wonderful to be the center of attention.

Hey, stanley, where you going, big guy? Up to no good?

Pays $5 million. Nudity required.

Time to stop being polite and get real.

Racial profiling gossip.

We used to go on these long walks on the treadmill.

You can't put words back in your mouth. What you can do is spread false gossip

It's like the end of spartacus. I have seen that movie half a dozen times And i still don't know who the real spartacus is.

She's an 'anorexitec.'

Do you like it as much as you like men's butts? 'Cause you're gay.

This is not the first time rumors about me being gay have come up. Twice before, actually. Just a weird coincidence.

But if he was persistent, i might give in a little bit To just really see what it felt like.

What exactly is my responsibility here? To comfort insecure heterosexual men? That can't possibly fall to me.

And you're gonna regret that when you find yourself between a moose and her cubs at night.

One of you will make a great mother.

You know, a baby conceived out of wedlock is still a bastard.

If i can't scuba, then what's this all been about? What am i working toward?

You think i'm the voice of the taco bell dog?

You told people that i use store-Bought manure When i showed you where my manure comes from.

I spread the rumor that somebody here was a j. Crew model and i was referring to myself.

Because a lot of people think that models, Even though they're very attractive are somewhat vapid. It set our industry back quite a bit.

Her breasts were a tiny bit bigger. At first i thought, oh, she has a new bra with padding. But then i thought, pam doesn't need padding.

That is the inside of your vagina.

We should have realized that you are an equal part of this.

Hey, what up, cynthia?

I thought it was 500. Oh. I guess i didn't learn anything.

I learned that if you look even the tiniest bit like jet li, Michael will call you jet li all summer.