Making A Stand

Okay, you can turn the music off. I already shot my wad. Off. No, that's tape.

I have got a quick way for us to literally be showered with money.

I think they're called Colombians. Oh, I forgot, we're being politically correct now.

A Colombian cartel that won't kidnap and kill you. I underlined 'won't,' 'cause it makes the competition look like...

Translation: Wish I'd thought of that. Nice translating, Dad.

It's not stupid. You're stupid. Nice pout, Dad.

If I didn't have a live dove in my pants right now, I would leap across this table

You and half of Orange County.

Boyfights 2, A Boyfights Cookout, and Backseat Boyfights: The Trip to Uncle Jack's 70th

Very secret. He doesn't even know, does he? He has not known of it. That's correct.

Why won't you (bleep) me?!

Well, our copy boy's very striking, but he often has toner on his fingers. I meant another lawyer.

Perhaps you can talk to Maeby while you're getting your eyebrows plucked. It'll look like your eyes are watering 'cause you're sad.

Que? What's Spanish for 'I know you speak English'?

Mom, if you're gonna speak to these guys like this, you might want to sleep with one eye open.

Hope you kept your punch card, you're about due for a free one.

Mom, however, will not have a choice.

That ship sailed 35 years ago.

Boyfights? Luchas del Muchachos. Si, Luchas del Muchachos! We had this video. Si!

Yo quiero leche, yo quiero leche del madre. Even though I'm so old.

Okay, I'll just take off this cheap fake, huh? And we going to put on this sign. Beautiful. You like?

They only wanted me because I had one hand. And I won't do it! That's not the way Mother is raising me.

Of course, I left my hand there, also.

That's a bloodsucker? It looks like Alf.

That's how Tony Wonder lost a nut.

And I'm trying to get her to renounce God and (bleep) me.

Well, as always, Gob, a mixed bag there, but the middle part sounded pretty admirable for a second

If you feel something moving down there, it's just the bird. I know it.

Don't call it that.

You're just scared of a little competish.

Don't tell them! Stick it in the what?!

We'll be the laughingstock of the boardwalk.

Well, we'll fudge that.

Don't call it that. Okay.

You want me to be explicit?

You better not lock it! I'll kick it in!

I was like, 'Make it two weeks! See if I care!'

Sorry, no refunds. And that's why you don't take your foot out of its wrapper.

Even if it means me never taking a job again. A pulse makes him worth it.

Hello? George Michael? I'm thirsty.

Is my name 'Champ'?

Don't worry, these young beauties have been nowhere near the bananas.

Dad, are they strippers? If I know your uncle, they're at least strippers.

But it was less entertaining than you might imagine-- no matter what music was put under it.

It was kind of funny to 'Yellow Submarine,' but who could afford it?

A Hefty bagfull of pesos.

'The only scary thing about a one-arm man trying to scare someone is the fact...' '...that he feels that his one arm is good for nothing but trying to scare somebody.' It's upside down.

Let's just hope they don't try to get even by trying to 'cirsumventing' the law.

But we are Guatemalan. Won't he know the difference? I think anything south of San Diego will be just fine.

Between a dad and his... his favorite son.

Gob Bluth doesn't cave. Yeah, you just did for me. Well, you asked me to, so I thought... Go. Go. Go. It's fine.

Blah-Blah-Blah. At 8:30, unless you want to sit at the bar.

Of course-- the 'Bob Loblaw Law Blog.' Wow. You, sir, are a mouthful!

While Tobias was trying to get his mouth around Bob Loblaw

Who did that for you, Industrial Light and Magic? Kopelson Plastic and Silicon.

Oh, I forgot my iPod.

Put on the sound effects! Put on the sound effects! CD... CD one! CD one! Track two! Track two!

He's good. He was a Groundling.

And that's why you don't teach your father a lesson.

And that's why you don't pit Gob and me against each other.

And that's why you don't use a one-armed person to scare someone.

I'm thirsty... Gangee.

I'm thirsty... Gangee.