Town For Sale

Told you I'd sell this town. Didn't I tell you? / Yes. Not to diminish your accomplishment, but you did say that a handful of times. / I think eight, to be exact.

My little suity-cases! Oh!

If I'm being perfectly honest, it's very low on the totem pole of coats of yours that I like.

I outbid Richard Branson for it at the Kaminski auction.

It would be her first piece of clothing made outside of mainland China.

I thought everyone just kind of dropped you like flies when you couldn't pick up the tab at the Waverly anymore?

I just have a different kind of relationship with my friends where we don't need to be in constant contact with each other.

And do what, eat a cronut at a Brooklyn flea market?

so I can pack how I wanna pack and I don't have to be called a circus freak all the time.

Is it a wig?

The coat you kept going on about that one time. / Are you sure it was me?

Oh, it's absolutely tragic, Jocelyn, that I will never see or speak to you ever again.

What's an all-inclusive vacation?

If I was staying, then yes! A thousand times yes! And if things were different and I wasn't leaving, um, then definitely yes. / So, is that a no? / Yes.

Oh, you just watch a season of Girls and do the opposite of what they do. It's easy.

I mean, I was looking at three bedrooms, but do I really need an office?

Yeah, judging by your tips, I was never really sure.

I don't wanna piss in your punch bowl, okay, but, um, I got a bad feeling about this buyer guy

He called me while he was bumping uglies with his old lady. / But that's not the problem. The problem is he put me on the speakerphone.

I mean, who would do such a thing? / I mean, that's something you would do. / No, no. That's not something I would do. / And I can't deal with another you.

The douchebag is right here.

I'm not a dolphin, Mutt.

You should really work on expanding your emotional range at some point.

So, what you're saying is he got a little short with you? / You, uh, weren't quite seeing eye to eye?

Knockoffs are getting so good these days.

I'm gonna feel like Patty LaBelle.

I'm gonna feel like Patty LaBelle.

His hours were up a month ago, he kept coming anyway. / What? / Yeah, maybe or maybe he just likes pretty girls in hippie hats.

I like you. I don't want to like you, but I do.

You've been my only friend, so... Great, nevertheless.

Yeah, not as many as you'd think, so...

That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

Sex in a pan. / Then we'll have dessert.

You didn't try it on, did you? / No. / Oh, why not? / I gave it away.

Smoking in a car with a baby, unless you crack a window, tipping before tax, mixing drinks with cola, and giving away a coat that doesn't belong to you.

Why did you do all that extra community service, Mutt? / I like to stay active. / Really?

You know why! / Why can't you just say it?

Talk to the hand, son, because I've gotta watch a pig eat.

Is it just me, or is it this dessert that's making me horny?

$975,000 suddenly seems like such a girly number. / I mean a million. That's bold, that's sexy.

Andy collapses and can't sign the contract

Roland and Johnny frantically trying to get Andy to sign while unconscious

People do come out of comas. / Oh, I'd kill for a good coma right now.

I'm pretty sure I'm engaged, and I'm pretty sure I just cheated on my fiance.