I Married Marge

D'oh!

Barnacle Bill's Home Pregnancy Test

Pirate-themed pregnancy test instructions

Test turns pink instead of blue or purple

D'oh!

If a test should fail... to a doctor set sail

Homer's pregnancy symptoms

Your mother just broke her leg

I smell a bun in the oven

You're a machine, Homer

For me, it's diaper changes and midnight feedings. Doesn't Mom do that? Yeah, but I hear about it.

I threw up more than your mother

Those were idealistic days-- The candidacy of John Anderson, the rise of Supertramp

Homer, you turn the blades too fast. The golfers are complaining.

Keep this up and someday you'll be the guy who hands out the putters

I thought it was over. You had a problem turning blades. You overcame it. The feel-good story of the year.

It's not our fault our generation has short attention spans. We watch an appalling amount of TV.

Don't you ever, ever talk that way about television

Homer's mid-sentence forgetting

Okay, girls, you can smoke now

I don't know what you see in that ugly meatball

If you like being pawed by something fat and lazy, we could get a cat. It would leave less hair on the couch.

Marge, get your butt out here!

Do you mean like will apes be our masters?

What do you think about? Well, girls. I mean boys! I mean you.

Well, thank you, Mr. Blow-The-Picture-For-Me

You're as pretty as Princess Leia and as smart as Yoda

Actually, she was singing about God. Oh, well, he's always happy. No, wait, he's always mad.

Someday I'll buy you a real castle. You don't have to do that. Whoo, good.

It must be the Champale talking

This castle is impregnable

D'oh!

So You've Ruined Your Life pamphlet

You'll never do any better. You lucky bum. The fish jumped right in the boat.

All you got to do is whack her with the oar

Damn it, where's that card?

In your face, everybody! Whoo-hoo!

The baby's name will be Kool Moe Dee Simpson

All the kids will call him Larry Fairy... Screwy Louie... Slob... Puke... Mucus

Bart, cart, dart, e-art-- Nope. Can't see any problem with that.

Get this punched every time. The tenth wedding is on the house.

No matter how many times I hear that, it always makes me laugh

You may not look like Ted Bessell, but you're just as nice

By the power vested in me by the state gaming commission

Hey, love birds, keep it down

Baby to Marge. Baby to Marge. Wah! Wah! Over.

I heard radiation can make you sterile. Now you tell me.

Smithers, you keg-meister, you

It takes me a long time to learn anything. I'm kind of a goof-off-- That will do.

We're all going to die! Run!

Yeah. The doctor.

What a crappy candle. You've ruined our vacation.

Handle first, handle first

I thought you said you liked dogs

Our model is the trapezoid that guarantees each investor an 800% return

Uh-oh! The cops!

We break thumbs

Repossessing stuff is the hardest part of my job

Shut up with that pen scratching down there

Can we have a can of frosting for lunch?

This taco is full of hair

They get doughnuts! All the colors of the rainbow.

You want fries with that?

Holy cow, you're as big as a house!

They won't even tell me what's in the secret sauce

The oil is burning my finger

I knocked you up

'I knocked you up.' 'No, because I love you.'

The hunter has become the hunted

Treat me like dirt-- I'll still kiss your butt and call it ice cream!

Feisty, yet spineless

This man failed the aptitude test and got trapped in a closet on his way out

Only in America could I get a job!

Simpson, eh? I'll remember that name.

Don't ever call me that

This is my wife, and my kid. I'm paying for this delivery.

Tomorrow, I'm a nuclear technician! Good God!

As long as he's got eight fingers and eight toes, he's fine by me

He did that on purpose! How could he? He's only ten minutes old.

Homer! I'm not pregnant! Yeah! Whoa! Excellent, Marge! Yes!