I Bowl Buster

Will:Boom, in Clyde's face. Ten bucks. Now give me my money, Pee Wee.

Carlton · Will:This isn't just a video game, Dad. This is the new 32-bit super system...with digitized sound, VGA graphics and full-motion video. Yo, and it's real cool too.

Will:You've been rejected your whole life. You should be used to it by now.

Carlton · Will:Somebody, pinch me. Ow!

Uncle Phil:Well, you see, you two left the TV on, and... And, well, I, you know...

Uncle Phil:You want a piece of me?

Will:What about that piggy bank in your closet...under them issues of Big Butted Butler Babes?

Geoffrey:That was just a lucky guess, man.

Uncle Phil:Carlton's going to Princeton and you're panhandling. It's nice to see that everybody's reaching their potential.

Will:No.

Uncle Phil:Well, just keep them away from my car. I just got it waxed.

Hilary:Planned? I don't know. I thought I'd just watch them run around.

Carlton:Crash through the line of blue... Fight, fight For every yard. Princeton's honor to defend. Rah-rah-rah!

Will:So I guess that makes Pokey here the crème of wheat.

Uncle Phil:What's this? A Twinkie.

Will:A Afro pick. I wonder who this belonged to.

Will:I don't think you wanna be shaking hands with President Johnson right now.

Will:I mean, I know this might be a bad time, but you got some spare change?

Will:Hey, look, Carlton, we're in a public place, man. Now don't embarrass me.

Will:Get out of here before I hurt you, girl.

Carlton · Will:Six and a half. Oh.

Carlton · Will:These look like they've been worn before. Carlton, take the shoes and come on. Fine.

Will · Carlton:Dude, you rolled a 130. That's good. You know what that means? That I'm a natural? No. You gotta buy lunch. Huh?

Blue Birds · Will:It's not Big Birds, Big Ears. It's Blue Birds. Big Ears. That's funny. I'm gonna remember that when cookie time roll around.

Hilary:Geoffrey, can you give us a ride to nature?

Uncle Phil · Will:Heh, heh. That's your Aunt Viv. Yeah, uh, her facial hair was different back then.

Hilary:We were startled by a deer, swarmed by butterflies. And I have such a headache from that babbling brook.

Will:What, the adapter for your inflatable doll came in?

Uncle Phil:Oh, so you're going to bowl? Ha-ha-ha. Well, that's very different. You certainly don't need Princeton for that.

Carlton:For the first time in my life, I'm standing on my own two feet filling my own two shoes.

Uncle Phil:Shut up, Will.

Vivian:It is a sad, sad day when Will Smith becomes the voice of reason.

Geoffrey:No. It just seemed the right thing to say.

Will:Pins? What is that short for, pinhead?

Carlton:I used to dream that I was being chased by hot dogs and doughnuts. But it's just a dream. It means nothing.

Will:The man's hopped up on a 25-year-old Twinkie.

Carlton:Will, you're suffering from Pins envy.

Bowling Alley Employee:And by the way, I have a coffee break in 15 minutes.

Will:Oh, yeah? Well, why don't I not and say I did?

Will:Let's just grab our balls.

Will:Wait a... All right. Wait a minute. My shoe. My shoe... My shoe stuck. But... That's a do-over. That's not... No, hold up. No, that's a do-over. That's... No. Somebody paged me right when I went... Right when I was... Right when I was doing this, somebody paged me.

Hilary:Last one in the sauna is gonna get clogged pores.

Will:I kind of took a different approach. I kind of, like, steered right at him, you know what I'm saying? I think I may have strengthened his resolve to throw his whole life away.

Will:But then I had found out bowling ain't no sport.

Uncle Phil:Will, I find out that you contributed to my son not going to Princeton... you will be picking my shoe leather out of...

Will:You're darn skippy, we should.

Carlton:Oh, sure, it offered a quick high, cheap thrills and fast women, but who wants that?

Carlton:Dad, I can beat you at bowling.

Uncle Phil:You want a piece of me?