Pawnee Commons

Support for Pawnee Community Radio comes from listeners like you and from the new film The Shadows of Seven Heads, the dramic tale of an Israeli soldier who falls in love with conjoined Palestinian sextuplets.

sitting in for Nina Joplin, who is touring the country performing a spoken-word opera about pear-shaped women

Your show last week on dolphin lactation was just riveting radio.

A Bat-Signal, for listeners who might not know, refers to the children's character 'the Bat-Man' a strong gentleman who fights crime nocturnally.

This is all gonna fall apart if you don't hurry.

movie reviews with Ken Tucker who is filling in for David Bianculli who's in New York filling in for Ken Tucker

Now it's time for 'Jazz Plus Jazz Equals Jazz,' today we have a recording of Benny Goodman played over a separate recording of Miles Davis.

Also, I'm innocent. Please find me a lawyer.

This is like Parks Department porn.

I don't care if he's some junkie war criminal pimp.

His name's Wreston St. James. He's from Eagleton. Oh, I've changed my mind.

I'm not being melodramatic when I say that people from Eagleton are snobby and evil, and they look down on Pawnee, and they would most likely exterminate everyone who isn't from Eagleton if they weren't so busy being obsessed with themselves.

Sometimes when I rant about Eagleton, I forget to breathe, and I pass out.

Friends, former lovers, acquaintances, Jerry

Much like women in '90s stand-up comedy routines, Tommy be shopping.

And Louis Vuitton for making some dope-ass cravats.

Help.

Help. I can't move.

What am I supposed to do with my garbage, just throw it on the ground?

Oh, hey. Thank you for the trash!

Its official name is 'Five Mile Grounds', but we like to call it 'Wide smiles abound.'

[Visual contrast between Pawnee side (brown, barren) and Eagleton side (lush, green)]

Will you come down here, please, and keep me company? I'm so bored. I need you.

I did everything I was supposed to do, and I walked around the building four times. Only 20 minutes has gone by.

I got so bored, I started thinking about existence-- 'Do I matter? Do any of us? Is there a master plan in the works, a grand design?'

Ugh! Who cares?

Isn't this how all great Bert Macklin cases start?

It's quiet. A little too quiet.

The scientists think it's going to linger for another 40 years.

In 1988, we were hit by a tornado. We asked Eagleton for help, and they claimed they weren't home. An entire town claimed they weren't home.

It's us.

Donna, you and your work are ravishing, as usual.

Jerry! How's the old ticker? Oh. Well, uh, the rehab is grueling-- Great! Glad to hear it.

June, 1817, the richest among them take all of their money from the bank and then flee up the hill like cowards to form Eagleton.

Do not blame me for the sins of my mother.

We have a mural called 'The Many Surrenders of Pawnee.'

My name is Judy Hitler, and I am the spoiled only daughter of Adolf.

Oh, Hitler, you sexy bastard. No!

Why are you using this wood? Is it more pliable? What are these metal latches? Are they copper or brass? Is one better? And if so, why?

Before I started, it was bigger.

It's a flight of stairs that leads to nowhere.

Yes. Idi Amin. Or Lord Voldemort.

Have you guys seen Hitler?

I may have allowed my prejudices, my totally legitimate prejudices against Eagleton

I'm Leslie Knope. No. That's not what I want to say.

My mouth is dry. This is Canada Dry. Drink Canada Dry if your mouth is dry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Great. And then you can come to our wedding. Huh? What?

I think one of the mannequins tried to commit suicide.

One small pizza for all of us. With no toppings. Cheese is a topping, Jerry.

If there were more food and fewer people, this would be a perfect party.

Oh, hey, I'm just kidding, buddy. I'm just playing around. My name's really Andy Dwyer. I'm a security guard.

There are several drool buckets for your more... slack-jawed citizens.

We also have food troughs full of cheeseburgers and public showers with instructions for those who've never showered before.

Oh, hey, my backyard is bigger than your park.

They call their boogers Pawnee caviar.

We're gonna find out where he lives. We're gonna drive to his house. We're gonna set it on fire and watch it burn.

Thank you for saving me, Andy. Thank you, too, miss Hitler.

Well, Eagleton lies on top of a hot spring which creates a micro-climate zone. We are... truly blessed.

Revenge! Ha ha hal This is for Pawnee, you butt-faced pompous jerk! Whoo!

You want a carton of eggs and a loaf of bread. Yeah, just the pancake breakfast is fine.

You can't have Rent-A-Swag without the swag

A strange, passionate, goof ball of a woman. Me. He's in love with me.

A strange, passionate, goof ball of a woman. Me. He's in love with me

40 years undercover. I never even met my family. And this is all I have to show for it? Totally worth it.

I basically live here now. I hate all of this, which probably means it's good for your business.

Two pizzas. And toppings! Only on half. I'm not Zuckerberg.