The One with the Stain

And nagging works!

Oh, no. Was I cleaning in my sleep again?

I hope by 'maid' you mean 'mistress' because if some other woman was cleaning..

'Relinquish' is just a fancy word for 'lose.'

Yes, I distinctly remember because I thought it was a joke.

Usually when I'm this anxious, I clean.

I never get calls!

Wow. What an incredible violation and wonderful surprise!

I was wondering if you were the sort of person who eats lunch?

No, no. Wait! I was just saying that so you'd think I was a good person.

Fight for me.

Not great, but we can work on it at lunch.

Great. How do you know where I live? I've got friends too.

I don't want my child's first words to be, 'How you doing?'

That's not really porn? Not so much.

Oh, my God. Was she old? Does she have a view?

Reaction beat - Ross and Rachel's awkward pause

And I'm Rachel, an admirer of the building.

Oh, thank God!

Awkward silence after Dutch question

Could you tell me, is she hanging in in a one-bedroom or a two?

You know what? We just met.

She stole my jeans!

Don't you see? It's the perfect crime!

Isn't it possible the company that sold the jeans made more than just the one pair?

Shouldn't we give her the benefit of the doubt before we snoop around her crotch?

Face. Yeah. Yeah.

You're blurry, but you still look like Ursula. You're 'Blursula.'

See? It works. I'm not angry at all anymore. This is a great date!

Yeah, not so much.

Really? No.

Really? No.

You're not gonna be on TV!

Hey, Gunther, you're an ezel.

Damn it!

Oh. You're not getting it.

Why was your head just between my legs?

Well, my head was between your legs.. because I find you very attractive.

No room? It's a baby. It's, like, this big.

'Where's the baby?' 'Oh, it's right over..'

I could use a challenge. It's getting pretty easy.

Or maybe we'll do it in the bathroom of the club!

You're the hottest roommate I ever had.

No, I've gotten in trouble for that before.

Really? That's the thing I'm worst at! You'll see.

Because I put my head between her legs.

No. I was getting into position, and then everything went dark.

She's wearing my bra!

Oh, dear God!

Yet you don't recognize that you're crazy?

I fear a jury will see it the same way.

You see that? Do you see this?

You need new clothes.

Well, I brought her some bloemen.

If I didn't have sex with you, I had sex with somebody that looked like..

It's like I was saying to Ursula when I was making love..

Yeah, so do you.

It's flown into your blouse, and you better undo your buttons lest it sting you.

Look, I know it must be hard that your wife is a lesbian..

Could I just see your bra?

I figured it'd be okay because you've got a big ink stain on the crotch.

You mean the one you're wearing?

I quit! Sounds about right.

till the baby comes, we can use as walkie-talkies.

If I'm bringing home a woman who can't stand a baby.. then maybe I don't wanna be with that woman.

Or maybe we'll do it in the bathroom of the club!

It's got a tail! Get it out of here!

And because I'm such a strong, strapping alleenstaande..

What..? You.. But.. Bu..