Mac and Charlie: White Trash

Mac:Heat wave!

Charlie:Heat wave!

Mac:Heat wave!

Mac:Charlie, chug this.

Pool Attendant:We're in the middle of a terrible heat wave... and you happen to be at capacity- for us.

Mac:Don't you get it? We got big-timed, dude. He called us lower class.

Mac:Ugh! Gross, dude. I will not go to that disgusting public pool. People there are gross.

Charlie:'Cause Jamie Nelson drowned in it.

Ahh!

Mac:Man, I'm gonna have to keep tinkering with the A.C. 'cause I can't feel it at all.

Mac:That's why I got the gold chain.

Mac:Don't do airplane noises. Just give him the beer.

Mac:Because you're not even supposed to be here. Frank is the audience. Just keep your mouth shut.

Mac:Boom! Pool!

Frank:Pass. ... Just let me finish. Pass. It's too much work. What else you got?

Dennis:You're born into class. It's about pedigree. It's about upbringing. It has nothing to do with your present circumstances.

Frank:I quit on that shit. You understand? I quit on it. I don't give a rat's ass about class. I live on the fringe. Fringe class is where I am.

Frank:We could go pop a hydrant.

Dennis:Well, we know you. You could sponsor us. I don't know what kind of idea you have about us, but we, sir, are like you.

Want a little something sweet?

Dee:Well, good for you. You keep a couple of token ones around, do you? Parade 'em around like dancing monkeys?

Dennis:And having class means being able to mix with people that are beneath you.

Dee:Your shirt doesn't even fit, by the way. If you wanna be an elitist, get yourself a tailor.

Dennis:Oh, Jesus Christ. This is like a goddamn zoo.

Dennis:That girl just jumped in with her sneakers on. These people all have sneakers on.

Frank:I bartered fringe style with that guy over there. I gave him a bite of my hot dog, he's letting me use his towel.

Mac:We could be, like, 'That's where the swim-up bar is.'

Mac:Well, I was thinking we'd be at capacity for Dennis...

Mac:I don't wanna put a tin can in the water with a string 'cause we're not eight.

Charlie:There hasn't been chlorine in here since Jamie Nelson.

Charlie:I was climbing up the mattress - sort of like a ladder-type situation.

Charlie:Aw, shit.

Dennis:I just stepped on broken glass. Ow! Oh, my God. There are shards of broken glass all over the bottom of the pool.

Dennis:Well, now I know why people are wearing shoes.

Frank:You grease the watermelon up, you throw it in the pool. Everybody goes crazy trying to grab it. They can't grab it. Greased watermelon!

Dennis:Which one of you little shits stole my shoes? Goddamn it!

Mac:I'm putting out a feeler call. Stride, stride, stride, stride, execute.

Mac:Charlie, I do back flips every single day of my life.

Mac:Well, I need to stay focused and conserve energy, and that's, you know- Come on.

Mac:What if I need to do a back flip later?

Mac:You've had a cell phone this entire time, dude? Are you kidding me?

Mac:Because getting stuck in an abandoned pool is extremely low class. Dennis will sink his teeth into it.

Charlie:We're stuck in a pool!

Dennis:Is that Mexican music?

Mac:It's one of the attendants. He's walking around with... a ghetto blaster... serving us drinks and just making us comfortable, giving us hats.

Mac:The attendant, you know, he just walked off with my shoes... and - it made me mad because he didn't ask. But it's great because in the end I'm gonna end up with polished shoes.

Charlie:I buy 'em all the time. You prepay for it, and then you buy it and you throw it away. There's a name for it.

Mac:This is like felon class.

Charlie:Yeah, we probably shouldn't get Chinese though... because those delivery guys are always Chinese... and he won't understand a word we're saying... And plus, he's probably gonna be too short.

Charlie:It'll be some big Italian lug, and he'll fish us out of here.

Pizza Delivery Guy:Hey, you guys order a pizza?

You gotta be kidding me. He's Chinese.

Charlie:I cut them off 'cause they were overshooting the bottom of my shorts.

Pizza Delivery Guy:Hey, this chain's fake as shit, man.

Mac:Don't you understand? This pool is our bootstraps... and it's lifting us up into the middle class, dude.

Charlie:Well, just accept the fact that you're white trash, all right? Take a look at yourself. You can't do back flips. You don't know karate. You're white trash!

Mac:Do not call the shorts white trash. Dennis told me about these shorts. They're not white trash.

Charlie:I put the phone in my front pocket.

Frank:This Filipino lady went crazy on me. She started scratching me like a velociraptor.

Dennis:We're not at capacity, 'cause I can see the pool from here.

Pool Attendant:We are at capacity, sir!

Dennis:I'm jumping in the pool!

Dee:Yeah. Plus I'm gonna piss in it.

Mac:Lamb of God who takes away

Charlie:What is that? There's a lamb?

Charlie:Alligator tooth and snakeskin -

Mac:Don't undermine my prayer with voodoo.

Mac:Admit that you are low class, just like us.

Dennis:I hope you trash bags die at the bottom of this pool like Jamie Nelson did.

Frank:I think I have a way for us to beat the heat tonight... Philly style.