The One with Joey's New Brain

It's just... Monica said, 'wedding.'

Do you think you could get through a poem? / A short one.

Whatever it is, I hope it involves winking.

You're not gonna believe it. My character is coming out of his coma!

So great things are happening at work and in your personal life.

It's ridiculous that you haven't had sex in three and a half months.

It's winter. There are fewer people on the street.

I don't think I've ever seen her finish a beverage.

Why is this so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist.

Mainly because he's kissing that other guy.

Oh, yeah, he's too cute to be straight.

Knockers will help us figure it out.

Or we could use it to call China, see how those guys are doing.

Kind of like a fairy tale for the digital age.

That wasn't a date. That was friends getting together and having sex.

Yeah, and until now, I didn't think I would love again.

Aha! Too slow! / Aha! Too cocky.

What are you going to do, kill him? Like you did Charles? / That was an accident. / And so were you.

Can I get some ice here?!

Oh, that was a real person?

Which writer? Was it bald or was it tall?

Fine. But I bet you'd be singing a different tune if we were fighting over a ratchet.

No way. You can't use that to get the cute guy and the last blueberry muffin.

Oh, all right. Oh, so close. If only it said, 'yogurt.'

His new girlfriend.

I think it's the Dying Cat Parade.

Why is your family Ross?

It'll be like when he rapped at my bat mitzvah.

I think it's 'Celebration' by Kool and the Gang.

But while you dial, let me show you the features of my new ringing handbag.

Yes, she is. Just one moment, please. It's for me!

You know, to think about my mom and her suicide. / Oh, Phoebe! / What? That's the first time today.

I'm 16. / See you in 2003.

I can do an English accent?

That baby's going on my résumé.

Vikings.

Sitting down and being quiet.

Because we hate them.

I'll bet there'll be a wee bit of celebration.

It's a little weird, but it's getting better.

Probably should've just left years ago when the offers were pouring in... but I just got so comfy here and... I turned down some amazing work. Like what? Well, let's just say if I'd left 15 years ago... the landscape of Mexican cinema would be very different today.

But I'm also thinking, 'She is hot.'

No, it's because that way the camera only sees her.

Wow, how long were we arguing for?

We were waiting for a hot guy, and then an even hotter one shows up.

No, they do, but you just have to wait.

Actually, I rent the whole place. I just got what you meant. Thank you.

That explains all the women's underwear. / Sure.

I'd love to, but my lawyer said I can't do that anymore.

You're a stupid bitch. / I really can't slap you.

After this, she's not gonna be crazy about electricity either.

I can imagine you in a short plaid skirt and knee socks.

No. / No.

Don't you recognize your own... mother?

The airport? / No, that's LaGuardia.

And I just got what you meant. That is... That's a tricky one.