The One with the Cheap Wedding Dress

- You're into swing music? I used to go all over town listening to bands. - Chandler? - Gap commercial.

- What is your job? - Staying out of the way.

- There were only 12. - Oh, yeah, I added three.

Being engaged, I'm not nervous talking to pretty girls anymore.

This street is the first in the city to have an underground sewer system. Before that, sewage and waste would just flow right down the street. Sometimes ankle-deep.

Smooth.

Oh, my God!

If I knew you, I'd cry.

Ball like a baby.

- I'm not. I just like to try these on. - I do the same thing. I'm just kidding. I'm getting married July 25. I'm just kidding too. I'm getting married in December.

I almost called off my wedding.

Is that spelled with a C or a K? It doesn't matter, they're both great!

I own this store.

So does this come in another color, or...?

Guy who was helping me had to leave because he hurt his back.

What a beautiful name. What is it again?

Don't take a nap on this stoop. You could wake up with your shoes gone.

You look strong. Why don't I take that, and you grab one of the boxes.

So when they open those doors, fan out.

Three sharp blasts. When you hear it, come running.

No, not it. Not it. Not it.

Don't crowd me.

You freak!

Maybe I do. I'm pretty feisty!

Okay! Hey? Oh, what do I do?!

You gotta hold my hand!

Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with every flush?

I mean, that doofus is going to lose.

Or I'm the one who dates her.

That's interesting. But check this out. I date her.

And a slice... $6?

Can I borrow $94?

You listen here, missy!

Does that mean Carcass is available?

For me.

What's this? Did you give yourself a facial? I have an oily T-zone.

I sent the flowers before the actual date, so technically... I didn't break any rules.

Joey got meat sauce on the banister again.

They suck so much that people die at their concerts. They just stop living.

you were the woman that I wanted to dance all my dances with.

Oh, crap.

I guess the more muscles you have... the more they can spasm out of control.

I don't anymore.

That's right. Don't you play a woman?

A woman in a man's body. Much better.

another time after that.

Have you ever been so hungry on a date... that when the girl goes to the bathroom, you eat her food?

You said the waiter ate my crab cake.

Was it because the woman was straight or because she was a lesbian?

Just seems like Ross is the kind of guy who'd marry a woman... on the verge of being a lesbian and then push her over the edge.

Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?

Have you ever slept in the same bed with a monkey?

You leave Marcel out of this!

Have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet, VD-boy?

Monkey-lover!

Probably around gonorrhea.

Does a bear shit in the woods?

No. We only mess around at his place.

Wow. You look hideous.

That's like the most ugliest dress I've ever seen.

It makes me want to rip it off you.

I should probably leave you girls alone.

Laugh all you want, but in 10 minutes, we'll have younger-looking skin.

Oh, nice shot! Yeah!