The One Where Joey Tells Rachel

You know who else I like? You. And it doesn't get said enough. I like you, Ross.

I'm an actor, you know? As a group, we tend to be overdramatic.

Rachel?!

That's the youngest girl to reject me.

You know how you find him? Stop looking. I've stopped looking for Russell Crowe. He'll find me.

A tall guy with hair similar to mine? Oh, unknowable universe!

Luckily, the guy she settled for can't hear you.

He may not be my soul mate, but a girl's gotta eat.

Rachel?!

It's like you and me going out, only weirder.

I know you're hurting.. but don't say that again.

Sure, women never like Joey. I think he's a virgin.

He wants to leave the country.

He just asked me how to convert his dollars into Vermont money.

Soul mate.

I know! Is this 1985?

I'll have a mocha-ccino.

I believe in handsome strangers who hit on my wife.

I understand if you came by to hit me. I deserve it. / No, I don't want to hit you. / What, then? Kick me? / No. / Bite me?

All I got is melon stuff that Rachel left.

That's the green stuff talking.

I'm understanding, but let's not get carried away.

That's some pretty smelly work, huh, Don?

And you're still married to him?

I'm really not high. I just used to be fat.

Is it made of cheese?

No. A house made of cheese, wouldn't that be incredible? / I'd move in tomorrow!

I don't know how you fight that.

Here, in the hall? What are we, animals?

Don't you people ever knock?

I'm sorry, did you say 'cheese'?

No, but I'm sure 'tomahtoes' does.

Do you know how hard it'd be to clean?

This is a nice place.. and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvin doing Hobbes.

I wouldn't think Hobbes would like that so much.

Second's up!

Not that kind of table.

Oh, you're kidding. It's a joke. Funny. It's funny! I don't get it.

You can't do this to a pregnant woman!

You know, I was only kidding. / Yeah, that was a real good one.

I kind of hope it's the girl. The guy is really cute!