The Gang Wins the Big Game

Charlie:The word is "superstition," not "stupidstition."

Mac:I know what the word is, Charlie. I'm saying your Green Man suit is a stupid superstition.

Mac:I'm not a Cowboy fan, I'm a Tony Romo fan, and he retired, so now I bleed green.

Mac:What's going on with your eye?

Dee:Nothing, I got a... I think I got an eyelash in it. You're, like, scratching it and it's blinking... I just, I slept on it funny.

Chug, chug, chug... That's 15. Post that, Jack, post it, baby.

Dee:No big, giant, ridiculous hands.

Fan:What? What? D-Don't make me go without them.

Dee:You have literally picked out the biggest pieces of shit in the city.

Mac:I got to agree with that. These guys are pieces of shit.

Dee:What is in your mouth?

Fan:Chew.

Dee:Awesome, cool, good to see you.

Dee:Your nose is bleeding as we speak.

Cricket:Okay, I came up portside on a horse, and he was a little quicker than me... that's lesson learned.

Dee:Rex represents the best that Philadelphia has to offer.

Dee:Either way, Cricks, you're out.

Is this a bar?

Nice. Nice.

Fully stocked, baby.

Charlie:L. E. S. Eagles.

Fan:This is, like, the tenth time.

Charlie:Yeah, i-it turns out there's not that many songs about Philadelphia.

Cricket:All right, fine, it's me. Cricket.

Cricket.

Cricket:Yes, it's me, it's me. I snuck on, all right? This damn nose.

Mac:I don't want to set a precedent of little mishaps setting us back, so... Cricket, you're back in.

Mac:Sh-She don't even like football.

Waitress:Yeah, football sucks. But if Charlie missed the bus, he missed the bus. I'm not missing a second of my dreamboat, Tommy Terrific.

Waitress:Go, Pats. Go, Pats. Go, Pats.

Driver:Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Waitress:Drive. Drive. Go, Pats. Go, Pats.

Driver:Shit, pothole.

Mac:You're involved in that pyramid scheme, too? / No. No hocking berries at the Super Bowl, Rex. Just be meat, okay?

Rex:Well... take off your shirt, please.

Frank:No, no, no. They don't have axles there. But I can get a new pair of jean shorts.

Dee:We invite the wrong crowd, and now we've got people going on expeditions for jean shorts. And hocking magical berries and rooting for the Patriots?

Charlie:Well... E-A-G-L-E-S. Eagles.

Mac:Well, we made it to the Super Bowl. That was easy.

Dee:Yeah, it was incredibly smooth.

Mac:Let's-let's cool it on the boos, you know? That's-that's kind of, like, what we're famous for, you know? We-we boo ourselves, we boo the Eagles, we boo Santa Claus.

Mac:We-we boo ourselves, we boo the Eagles, we boo Santa Claus.

Dee:Okay, "Everybody look at me, I'm a stupid Pats fan, making up stuff about Dee's eye."

Dee:Would a person with pink eye do this?

Mac:Would she do that?

Frank:I choked down some dogs too fast. They-they didn't settle, you know? They came back up, actually. On the other dogs.

Waiter:How did I move all the way to Minnesota, and I'm still waiting on you people?

Gang:I-I don't know this guy.

Gang:No, you never waited on us. We don't live in Minnesota, bud.

Frank:I tied his shoelaces together.

Mac:This Minnesota rube, he's not ready for your big-city shenanigans, Frank.

Frank:I felt a little piece of kidney stone break off and go through the, into the bladder.

Mac:Why didn't you tell me that you have a kidney stone, dude?

Mac:You can't see because you have a very serious bacterial infection in your eye.

Frank:Ding-dong here's getting honored with the rest of the vets. I'm gonna sneak down there with him. When we get close to the field, I'm gonna let you in on a little plan I've whipped up.

Mac:So, you know what, you can go, but I'm, I'm just gonna cover you up so people don't know that you're from Philadelphia.

Dennis:Luxury suite? Napkins? Utensils? We're going soft up here in this ivory tower.

Mac:Tom Brady does not care that you are here.

Rex:It's the Invigoron berries, man. They're loaded with sugar, but I'm in too deep. I've got to sell 40 cases of this stuff or I'm gonna lose my apartment.

Waitress:Hell yeah, another Patriots touchdown. Tommy Touchdown coming to get y'all. Yes.

Mac:You know what? You get out, too.

Waitress:I can go?

Mac:Yes.

Waitress:All right. Tommy, Mama's coming.

Every time Frank goes to the bathroom, the Eagles score.

Mac:Are you pissing?

Mac:Piss, Frank, piss.

Frank:I'm pissing, and it hurts like shit.

Mac:Just keep peeing. I don't know. It's not updating.

Mac:Frank, drink.

Frank:Got to piss.

Mac:I need you to piss through this entire game, Frank. We can't leave this bathroom. The Eagles need us.

Cricket:Perfect timing, man. I need to get this out to Brady. Brady's ready to go out. He's really wiping that sweat off with that towel. I mean, he's really going at it.

Frank:I can't piss no more. It hurts like shit.

Mac:You got to force it out, then.

Rex:It's a berry found deep in the jungles of the Amazon forest, and available for the first time. I'm a happy client.

Mac:We are Philadelphia. These guys are a total embarrassment. We blew it, man.

Mac:Because that's who he is, man. And you know who we are? We're losers. All of Philadelphia. We're angry, and we're mean and we're cruel.

Frank:No. Those guys, those guys are Philadelphia. They bust their ass every day just to get through.

Frank:Those guys, those guys are Philadelphia. They bust their ass every day just to get through. And then, on a Sunday, they put all their hopes into the Eagles.

Frank:And they get angry. And that anger builds into a stone of fury. And if it could just be released, then we could feel something different.

Frank:And that anger builds into a stone of fury. And if it could just be released, then we could feel something different.

Mac:Do it for the Birds, Frank. Do it for the whole city of Philadelphia, man, push.

Announcer:Brady, with White to his right, takes the snap.

Mac:Do it like Rocky, man. Push.

Mac:Do it like Rocky, man. Push.

Announcer:Brady lost the ball. Looks like he couldn't see the defender. It's-it's like something was wrong with his eyes.

Mac:You did it.

Frank:No, Mac. We did it. We did it. We did it.

Mac:I don't know why you care, fair-weather fan.

Mac:Fair-weather fan. You're from Minnesota, that's okay.

Waitress:I'm over Tommy Fumbles. I'm all about my man, Nick Foles.

Mac:Gross.

Mac:What did you do?. You sons of bitches, this is your fault. You screwed it up.

Mac:Do a superstition. Frank. Pee. Pee. Pee.

Frank:Hey, I'm dry.

Mac:Yeah, you're gonna have to get back in that trap.

Charlie:Aw, come on, man. You just told me to get out of it.

Mac:Yeah, that was before Brady had the ball.

Charlie:You just told me to get out of it.

Mac:Yeah, that was before Brady had the ball.

Charlie:Does it have to be the same leg or...

Mac:Same leg.

Announcer:He's hit. He stumbles.

Mac:Do it, do it now.

Announcer:He's throwing. He is going deep for the end zone, and it is... batted around... and incomplete. And the game is over.

Mac:We did it. The superstitions are real.

Charlie:Charlie, you did it. You did it, you were right. The superstitions were real. You did it, man.