The One Where Eddie Moves In

Casa de Joey. Huh? I decorated it myself.

Get out. No. / Wow, Joey, this is, uh... / Art. / Art it is.

Well, check this out. Is it a coffee table? Is it, uh, a panther? There's no need to decide.

So tell me, is this genuine Muppet skin?

Hey, excellent water-table thing. / Thanks. I love this. But you know what? It makes me want to pee. / Yeah, me too. I think that's the challenge.

Well, uh, it's because he had a thing with the... With the thing.

Nice toilet. / No, no, no. Behind it. / You have a phone in here? / That's right. I have a phone. In here.

Joey, promise me something. / Yeah. / Never call me from that phone.

Wait a minute. I claimed you in the name of France four years ago.

Ross, if you care about me, get the pie out of the man's hood.

What are you doing? / I'm sorry. My pie was in your hood.

I have to get the coffee out of that guy's pants and I'll be back in the hospital by 7.

Calm down. I'm blow-drying. / Blow-drying what? You have no hair.

Get out, you doofus!

Or, you know, he's rubber and you're glue.

I've never wanted you more.

You know what they say: Ask your slippers a question... you're going crazy.

You had a thing. / Yeah, well, I hear the place looks great. / Oh, forget about it. I'm having a ball, ha.

Was that the oven timer? / That's right, my friend. / It's time for Baywatch! / Baywatch!

Can you believe they gave Stephanie skin cancer? / I can't believe they promoted her to lieutenant.

See, this is the brilliance of the show. I say always keep them running. All the time running. Run. Run, Yasmine. Run like the wind.

I figured I'd have time alone with my thoughts. But it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.

He's decorated.

Oh. Oh, I thought they were just watching me. Like at an aquarium, you know?

Honey, we can talk about this. It's just that it's costing about $100 a minute to be in here.

Look at the cranial ridge, okay? If Dino was a velociraptor, he'd have eaten the Flintstones.

Did she leave a number? / Did you see me write one down? / I don't have her number, butt-munch.

Sweetie, before I forget, did I leave my diaphragm at your place? / Hi, Mom.

Is that Joey guy gonna pick up his moose hat or should I toss it?

At the, uh, supermarket in the, uh, ethnic-food section. I helped him pick out a chorizo.

When'd you start using moose in your hair?

It'll never last. He's just a rebound roommate.

Oh, my God! I know. I sound amazing!

Pretty, uh, different, huh? / Oh, I am sorry, but I'm incredibly talented.

I do, but, uh, Eddie makes them this way. They're pretty darn good.

All right, that's it! He just comes in here, Mr. Johnny New Eggs... with his moving the mail and his: 'See you, pals.'

And now there's no juice! There's no juice for the people who need the juice. I need the juice!

Nobody likes two kinds of eggs equally. You like one better, and I wanna know which.

You took your eggs, and you left! Did you really expect me to never find new eggs?

Look, I refuse to get sucked into this weird little Geller dimension thing, okay?

Mon, you've gone ultrasonic again, all right?

I hated you when we were kids. / You hated me when we were kids? / Yes. I hated you.

I loved you in a you're-my-brother-so-I-have-to way... but basically, I hated your guts.

Oh, my God! She's smelly cat!

Oh, oh, that song has so many levels.

You like that show? / You don't? / Ha, ha, what...? No. I mean, it's just pretty people running around on the beach.

Well, that's the brilliance of it. The pretty people. And the running.