The One with the Flashback

Wow, it's like a dirty math problem.

Well, that's really a different question.

bumped uglies

There was that one time Monica and Rachel got together.

What? Excuse me, there was no time.

Anybody need more coffee? - Hey, there's a dog out there!

Cute Naked Guy's starting to put on weight.

You didn't leave lipstick marks on the phone. Oh! Then it must have been you. Bye.

On some level, she already knows.

Okay, well, maybe not on those levels.

Nice to meet you, Chandler Bing. Bing! Great apartment, Chandler Bing. Bing!

When I answered the phone, 'Chandler Bing'... he said, 'Whoa! Short message!'

Foot on the floor or come over no more.

Your dresser is missing, but this she notices.

She met this woman at the gym, Susan something. And they really hit it off, and I think it's gonna make a difference.

Yes, that is cool. Uh, because I have models here, you know... never.

Well, I still have one more person to meet. But unless it turns out to be your sister... ahem, I think your chances are pretty good.

Bedroom, bathroom, living room. This here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by. Bye-bye.

Ha, ha. What gay thing? Uh, just, you know, in general. The whole people-being-gay thing. Totally cool with that.

Wanna hear something that sucks? - Do I ever!

That's what I want. A roommate I can walk around with... and be referred to as 'the funny one.'

Get ready for me to whip your butt. Okay, but after that we're shooting some pool.

How hard is it to get a couple drinks right, huh?

Isn't it exciting? I mean, it's like having a boyfriend for life! Heh!

I really think I need to just have... some meaningless sex, you know? With the next guy I see.

Excuse me, I seem to have dropped my ball. Yeah, so? And now I've picked it up again.

You can't even see where the Titanic hit it.

Ten bucks says I never see that woman again in my life.

What are they doing? - I don't know. Something girly.

You don't play the oboe. - I could play the oboe.

I'm Eric, Chandler's new roommate. - I'm Chandler's new roommate. - I don't think so. - I could be Chandler's new roommate.

It's the heat. And the humidity. That's... a tough combination.

So if the landlord ever asks... I'm an 87-year-old woman who's afraid of her VCR.

Okay... here's your penis!

Usually, yeah. Well, not just lemonade... iced tea, sometimes juice.

By the way, I can still see it.

You could've just turned the cushion over. I would have, but I had a spaghetti stain on the other side.

I need to live in a land where people can spill! - Well, you can spill. In the sink.

No, you're not. You're wondering which cushion it is.

No... You don't have a boyfriend because... I don't know why you don't have a boyfriend. You should have a boyfriend.

Listen, you are one of my favorite people... and the most beautiful woman I've ever known in real life.

Because Carol's a lesbian. And I'm not one. And apparently it's not a mix-and-match situation.

And I'd think: 'God, my wife is cool.' Heh.

Well, now I do!

Is it 100 percent cotton?

Maybe this wouldn't have happened if I'd been more nurturing... or I'd paid more attention... or I had a uterus.

Wait, wait, wait! My foot is stuck in the pocket.

That's not something a girl wants to hear.

My wife's a lesbian. Cool!

You missed the exit. Oh! Sorry. My God, what were you thinking about? Ahem, um... Barry.