The Master Plan

Tom claiming to be a good friend for throwing the party while immediately revealing he's using it to 'stock the club with every available hottie'

Tom's confidence that he'll have 'between one and four new girlfriends' by the end of the night

Andy guessing 'April' when asked about a song named after a month, and the awkward 'That would have been way better' response

April's deadpan confessional about being 21 and therefore 'the age that pretty much everyone agrees makes you an adult'

Leslie's theatrical villain laugh that 'sounded like a chimp there at the end'

The bureaucratic confusion about 'indefinitely' - 'Until when?' 'Indefinitely.' 'And when will that end?' 'Later than now.'

Leslie's defiant 'I'm not gonna fight them. Except that I am!' followed by Ron's resigned 'Okay.'

Leslie's anger management technique: 'count backwards from 1,000 by sevens and think of warm brownies'

Tom and Andy's terrible math trying to calculate the dating age rule, both arriving at different wrong answers

Andy's immediate realization that 'Tom says it's okay' probably means 'it isn't okay'

Ann explaining to Mark that couples are 'supposed to fight' and 'supposed to miss each other even if they're only gone for 20 minutes'

Mark's response: 'I should have yelled at you way more'

Jerry's panicked 'Death!' response to seeing the state auditors

Chris's over-the-top enthusiasm: 'there is quite literally nothing I would rather have in the world than a tour of the parks and recreation department'

Leslie comparing eye contact with Chris to 'staring into the sun'

Chris's carousel metaphor for government reform ending with 'get those happy kids back up on the horses where they belong!'

Ron's enthusiastic response to budget cuts: 'Where do I start? What exactly will you be cutting? And how much of it, And can I watch you doing it while eating pork cracklins?'

Leslie's over-the-top defense of Jerry: 'He is one of the best people on the planet. He's universally adored here. If you fired him, there would be a revolt.'

Ben's blunt correction of Chris's optimism: 'he said that because that sounds a lot better than, we're going to gut it with a machete'

Leslie's sincere belief that the building might have feelings: 'There's a lot of history in this one, maybe it does.'

Andy asking 'What's a not-gay way to ask him to go camping with me?' (presumably about Ben)

April's response to being offered a birthday shot: 'now that it's legal, I've kind of lost interest'

Tom bragging about his role in getting Trish crowned Miss Pawnee, with her talent being 'looking amazing'

The sound effect and visual of someone apparently falling or getting hurt during the party

Andy's enthusiastic greeting contrasted with Ann asking if she was a good girlfriend

Ann's drunk question: 'were there times that you were like, if I don't see Ann in, like, ten seconds, I'm gonna die?'

Ann's bitter realization: 'I dated him for three years. Now he's an adult with a job. And some other girl is gonna reap the rewards of my hard work? That's bull[bleep].'

Tom's 'classic game. Plant the seed. Harvest like a half hour later' while giving a bottlecap as a 'romantic' gesture

Jean-Ralphio's story about waiting outside the wrong woman's house for five days and still getting to 'third base, over the pants'

Andy's confused realization: 'I thought she liked me. I guess I'm super bad at picking up signals'

Andy calling Jean-Ralphio 'that Ralph Macchio guy'

Tom frantically asking multiple people 'Who the [bleep] did I give a bottlecap to?' having forgotten his own romantic gesture

April drunkenly mixing up 'thirsty' and 'weird': 'You know what's thirsty? You know what's weird? How thirsty I get when I'm weird. When I'm drunk.'

Leslie's drunk hostility toward Ben: 'save your breath, okay? Just get out of here. Because this is a party with my friends And you're trying to fire all my friends.'

Ann sarcastically praising Leslie: 'Leslie, that was so professional. I'm so proud of you.'

Ann's hangover crisis: 'I think I may have made out with someone last night' and her complete inability to remember who

Chris's vitamin routine: 'B12? Evening primrose oil? Willow bark? Magnesium?' and his belief he'll live 150 years

Leslie's defiant speech: 'You may hold my fate in your hands like a small bird, But I still think you're an ass.'

Chris needing someone present when he takes his multivitamin because of 'choking hazard'

April's relief contrasted with Andy's observation: 'For once, it's Ann who blacked out drunk And not Andy.'

Tom's bar tab revelation: '47 drinks' including 'Ten cosmos, eight Smirnoff ices, And everything else starts with the word pomegranate'

Tom's mathematical confusion about his imaginary orgy: 'The problem is I only have 15 penises. So there would have been 28 girls there that were really upset with me.'

Ben's backstory reveal: 'When I was 18, I ran for Mayor of my small town and won' followed by 'Here's the thing, though, about 18-year-olds. They're idiots.'

Ben's admission that his parents grounded him after being impeached as mayor

The revelation that Ben played 'Whoomp! There it is' at his mayoral swearing-in ceremony

Ann methodically asking every man she knows 'did we make out last night?' including the horrified Ron

The revelation that Ann was so drunk she gave Ben her phone instead of her phone number

Leslie hearing 'really loud circus music' when told the government will be shut down

Andy's song lyrics: 'November, your bangs are cute / November, your voice is a flute' followed by the reveal 'That song is about April'