The One Where Nana Dies Twice

Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights... does it get better than this?

Ah, you see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said 'co-dependent', or 'self-destructive'...

He's a he?

Oh God. I- just- I thought- Good, Shelley. I'm just gonna go flush myself down the toilet now...

Um... yeah.

Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not.

No, it's just because, uh, I kinda wanted to go out with her too, so I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman...

WHAT IS IT?!

Oh, oh, a quality, good, because I was worried you guys were gonna be vague about this.

I'm talking to Rome. I'm talking to Rome.

So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go to Rome.

What? Nothing. Oh, maybe that's it.

Not just restaurants, from our house.

She's not- past, she's present, she's back.

We're looking into it.

This almost never happens!

Yeah, you have homosexual hair.

Twice? Oh, that sucks!

We checked. A lot.

I always get this really strong Debbie vibe whenever I use one of those little yellow pencils, you know?

Sure. I just sharpened her this morning.

Now, see, I don't believe any of that. I think once you're dead, you're dead! You're gone! You're worm food!

So Chandler looks gay, huh?

You know, I don't know who this is, but it's not Debbie.

Here's my retainer!

You what? I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun.

And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.

Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says 'Jack Geller, so predictable'. Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say 'Buried at sea! Huh!'.

Well, I think Brian's a little out of your league.

Because I could get a Brian. Believe you me. ...I'm really not.

You know, whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrong one.

And where she's going everyone else will be dressier?

Some days it's all I can think about.

Hi, sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my bearings. Oh, you-you mean your earrings? What'd I say?

It's stuff like that, isn't it?

You know, I think it might be time for you to start using night cream.

Check it out, Giants-Cowboys. You're watching a football game at a funeral? No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.

God, what a great day. ...What? Weather-wise!

I'm fine. Just-just... having my worst fear realised...

What, what is it? You missed a belt loop. Oh! No-n- Okay, it's in spasm.

Sorry- Hi, I'm Dorothy's daughter. Hi, I'm Chandler, and I have no idea who Dorothy is.

I love you guys. You guys are the greatest. I love my sister, I love Pheebs... Chandler!

And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter to me.

Rachel. Rachel Rachel. I love you the most.

Just a, uh... hearing disability.

No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?'

I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wasting your money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.

I can imagine.

That little naked guy would be me. Aww, look at the little thing. Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?

Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked! Nono, that would be me again. I'm, uh, just trying something.

It's like Mardi Gras without the paper mache heads.

Pretty much, most of the time. We have a kind of... radar.

Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no.

He is? Yup, and way out of your league.

Out of my league. I could get a Brian. If I wanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian. Hey, Brian.