The One with the Cop

Dark red. Wrong, but there's a connect-the-dots in here for you later.

Hey, how about maroon? Yes! You are so smart!

Three-letter word. Not dog, but... Cat. You are so smart!

Nickel... Okay, dime. You guys keep talking. This could take a while.

Cool. But why would a cop come in here? They don't serve doughnuts.

Could you discover the badge again? I can do better than that.

My friend's been number 11 forever. This could be her year!

It's just that if you wear someone's sweatshirt... shouldn't it be your boyfriend's? And I'm not him.

Do I smell bad? You smell like a meadow.

The last time Joey went to a meadow his mother was shot by a hunter.

What's that doing here? I don't see any doughnuts.

Cops and doughnuts. Come on. If Chandler had said it you'd all be on the floor.

Come here to me. What? You say that to kids? The 'Come here to me' is, you know, for the ladies.

Ross, honey, it's a nice couch, it's not a magic couch.

Something didn't quite add up there.

Well, you. Her. I mean, she's very... you know. And you're, like... you know?

Not only did we go out... we did it 298 times!

You kept count? You are such a loser!

A loser you did it with 298 times!

Hold it! N.Y.P.D. Freeze, punk! That's right. You are so busted.

Book them. Who are you talking to? Save it, red!

Backup! Backup! I'm sorry! Sorry! Okay, cancel backup! Cancel backup!

It's true. I saw it on Dateline. Jane Pauley is the one woman I would kiss.

Left. Left. Okay, you know what? There's no more left left.

This guy was all: And I'm all, 'Buffay! Homicide!'

I'd better take it back. I'm totally drunk with power.

What if Martin Luther King had said that? I kind of have a dream. I don't want to talk about it.

There was no sex. I haven't dreamt of her like that... since I found out about you two. More or less.

Or it could mean you saw Chandler and me being close and stuff... and you want that too. Sounds like your dream.

Well, sure! I'm just wearing sweats!

Friends first? That's interesting. You become friends after? No, never done that either.

How you doing?

In fact, I'm undercover right now. I'm a whore.

Sipowicz? I don't think so. Yeah. Sipowicz. Yeah. Big guy, kind of bald. I don't know him. Don't try to call him. He's not there. He's out. His partner just died.

I heard that kid from Silver Spoons is really good.

Think I'll get me one of those. What's up, Joe? I saw you first, so...

Man, I wish I saw Phoebe first.

Certainly think a lot of yourself.

I see. I thought you just really, really liked your new couch.

Pivot! Pivot!

Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

What did you mean when you said 'pivot'?

Yeah, because it's not 1985.

Maybe we'll see you on World's Most Boring Police Chases.

I am not going back to that hellhole.

Suddenly, through no fault of my own, I became irresistible to her! And her roommate.

Closeness, schmoseness. There was three of us, for crying out loud!

If I go down, you guys go down with me. Harboring a fugitive? That's one to three years minimum.

You're the prettiest fake undercover whore I've ever seen.

He has a gun!

This couch is cut in half. I would like to exchange it for one that is not cut in half.

Look, I'm a reasonable man. I will accept store credit.

I will take it.